08-19-05_1946.jpg

right. a caption for this photo is being demanded out of me, so, um. i was looking through my old photos and thought this one looked interesting? 

09-21-05_1250.jpg

09-21-05_1250.jpg
Originally uploaded by aklw.

The bus stop i'm shooting this from is named "Opp Tan Tock Seng Hosp". The one in the picture, i assume is named "Tan Tock Seng Hosp". The building you see in the picture? Is not named Tan Tock Seng Hosp. I had to trek for five minutes from the ward wing of Tan Tock Seng to get here. The nerve they have, when naming bus stops.

the shape of things to come

if this, truly, is the shape of things to come, then this might be the last season of The O.C. i watch. yes, shocking, isn't it. second episode of the season, and already so ridiculous.

i feel like i need to watch at least three episodes of something good to make up for it. but it is three AM, and i need to ration the good stuff. i don't have many episodes of Stargate Atlantis left unwatched, and the first season is nowhere near ready.

and, so i leave you with a quote from the episode:

GIRL: (after hearing SUMMER's suggestion to raffle off a hybrid instead of a gas-guzzling SUV) "Air quality, is so important?"

OTHER GIRL: "I know. We breathe it."

Why do the aliens speak English?

Q: Why do the aliens speak English?
A: Practical reasons that come with television production. The time constraints of an hour-long episode mean that it would become a major hindrance to the story each week if the team had to spend the first 10 minutes of each episode learning to communicate with a new species.

how much do i love Stargate Atlantis?

09-13-05_0116

09-13-05_0116
Originally uploaded by aklw.

this one confirm you all ne'er eat before.

09-12-05_1534.jpg

09-12-05_1534.jpg
Originally uploaded by aklw.

Apparently, royston's ones are bigger.

the bluest light

god, i should go and fracking sleep now. only two hours of air-conditioning left.

the intense desire to throw everything at a wall or through a window

yes, it's back, again. sadly what i had in hand was what i was going to give to nelsie for her birthday. but i guess that doesn't fucking matter now, does it?

09-11-05_1912.jpg

09-11-05_1912.jpg
Originally uploaded by aklw.

...
won't break me down,
won't brick me up,
won't fence me in.

free ruler

Note: Free Ruler is only available for Mac OS X. It may work on Mac OS 9, but this has not been tested. It most definitely will not work on your stupid Windows PC.

messages - nelsie tay

i can't post the same thing twice in a row, so this will have to do.

what the hell, is going on?

Where are we?
What the hell
Is going on?

The dust has only just begun to fall
Crop circles in the carpet
Sinking, feeling

Spin me round again
And rub my eyes
This can't be happening

When busy streets
Amess with people would stop to hold
Their heads heavy

Hide and seek
Trains and sewing machines
All those years
They were here first

Oily marks appear on walls
Where pleasure moments hung before
The takeover
The sweeping insensitivity of this still life

Hide and seek
Trains and sewing machines (Oh, you won't catch me around here)
Blood and tears
They were here first

Umm, what'd you say, ohh
That you only meant well?
Well, 'course you did

Umm, what'd you say, umm,
That it's all for the best
Of course it is

Umm, what'd you say, hmm
That it's just what we need
You decided this

Umm, what'd you say, hmm
What did she say?

Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth
Mid-sweet talk
Newspaper word cut-outs

Speak no feeling, no I don't believe you
You don't care a bit
You don't care a bit

(Hide and seek)
Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth
Mid-sweet talk
Newspaper word cut-outs

(Hide and seek)
Speak no feeling, I don't believe you
You don't care a bit
You don't care a bit

You don't care a bit
Oh no, you don't care a bit
Oh no, you don't care a bit
Oh no, you don't care a bit

You don't care a bit

You don't care a bit

oh, god.

oh, god.

that is all. two words. call me what you will, but i don't think anything encapsulates my current stew of feelings as well as those two words.

and that was dawn

and that was dawn tan, reporting live from the VSC studios of TP DES. and, dawn, i checked. it's "Chine".

aaron is happy cause he is going to Chinos.

haha...aaron.90 bloody buck for IDN conference.
going? i think hmm.

je ne veux pas tout

there are only three green lights on my adium contact list right now. one is always green no matter what he is doing, so no point saying anything. another is going off to work soon, and the last one i'm not exactly close to.

so what's a lonesome person to do at five thirty in the morning?

i don't know. why am i awake, anyway? i missed the briefing yesterday because i spent too much time worrying about missing the briefing and hence couldn't sleep.

i ended up waking very, very late. so late it's not even funny. so here i am. there's another briefing today, and i tried to go to sleep earlier.

no dice.

so here i am, not sleeping. the only way to guarantee i will be awake when i have to be.

i've listened to, all night long, Sympathique, tracks from Our Little Corner Of The World: Music From Gilmore Girls, The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy, and The Powerpuff Girls: Heroes And Villans.

yes, happy music, for the most part. i think i'm trying to hard to be happy, and it's even harder because i'm so very not happy. i tend to do certain things when i'm severely depressed--beyond my normal chronic depression, that is--and lately i think i've covered all the major points. alternating between eating a whole lot and eating nothing at all, not even trying not to be completely irritable all the time, not speaking at all, saying only nasty things, not doing anything that will count for working towards the things i want to work for, giving up on everything, appearing to wake up on the wrong side of my mattress when there isn't any other side to wake up on, wanting to throw all my things all over the place, et cetera, et cetera.

what am i going to do? what do you do when you hate everything and everyone and love everything and everyone and need everything and everyone, all at the same time? do you go to China? will it help?

what do you do? what do i do?

huh must watch lost ah? dowan already

TELEVISION: "... and win tickets to STOMP! ..."

SAMARIA KHOO: "eh i want!"

--FIVE SECONDS LATER--

SAMARIA: "huh must watch Lost ah? dowan already."

but it's impossible

i want to wake my PowerBook and check my email. but i can't for the next two hours at least.

i want to go to the flea market at zouk that's opening in two hours. but i can't unless i be thick-skinned and ask rosemarie to cover me for a few hours and take care of my grandfather by herself.

i want. but all i have is sitting here with my phone, texting.

mad world

i am mad at the world. fuck off and try again next business day.

the spinning pinwheel-rainbow-beachball of death

i don't see why the fuck i should get the fucking spinning pinwheel-rainbow-beachball of death just because i've pressed the spacebar to scroll down one page on the webpage i'm reading.

i really do no see any reason why.

09-02-05_2201.jpg

09-02-05_2201.jpg
Originally uploaded by aklw.

She's crazy.

Je veux

Everyone's snoring. I can't sleep.

Today's the last day of term. I feel... sad. And I have a weird sense of foreboding.

If i don't pull myself together soon... I don't know. I might never? But one surely cannot live like this.

Je veux seulement oubiler,
Et puis je sieste.