someone cleaned out my room.

i lost the one gift tag i wanted to keep. now all i have left is the asinine one from my sister and, of all the tags to leave behind, xuan's. it's not gnarly or anything. just not the one i want to keep.

now what am i going to do.

Apparently not.

All aboard!

Grace Khoo sounds just like Daphne Khoo.

and i know this because she just called me, because my sister diverted all her calls to me while she was in johore Bahru.

i'm home.

was that the last eleven thirty service eighty bus i will ever take?

hello.

why, yes, i'm crazy. and you are?

guilt, when i allow myself to experience it--provided it actually manifests itself in me at all, can drive me to do incredible things.

21-12-04_1403.jpg

This is the new me.

you don't drink.

but you smoke?

shit

I feel like a shithead, an idiot, and an arse.

stupid jam

i am retarded. fawwaz was going to go home at ten, and at ten fifty i am still crawling past the american club. he got me something, and i couldn't even be bothered to get there on time. stupid idiot.

the best customer support people work in the middle of the night

i always seem to get infinitely better service and support when i call customer care lines in the middle of the night.

do i want nine hundred free SMS messages, airtime rollover and free IDD? or do i want all-day free incoming calls? i'm more than ready to trade four hundred free messages for all-day free incoming, and i'll surely exceed the free outgoing minutes every month, so it boils down to free IDD.

i'll call my mom to call them.

fibogel

you know what? james sng is right. constipation is the only time that shit doesn't happen.

mush05

i am now certain that if i move my head too quickly, the mush that is my brain will slosh around noisily.

i have been ill for about forty-eight hours now, and my body aches all over, and my nose sniffles every couple of mintues. typing is an effort. flipping open my phone took so much energy i couldn't even start what i wanted to do [which was clean up the inbox because the phone is full].

brain is mush. brain is no thinking any more. mouth very dry. i woke today like someone sucked all the saliva and wetness out of my mouth [and not in a good way either, though how would i know what the good way feels like].

class that was supposed to start at nine but just started. it's about mickey mouse stuff that i don't have to pay attention to anyway. must go home to nap and get my health back. but must call Club Rainbow and damon for the drums. and maybe call the bands. and maybe fling myself off the side of a building.

FAMILIES AGAINST the CASINO THREAT in SINGAPORE

FAMILIES AGAINST the CASINO THREAT in SINGAPORE

courtesy of Colin Tan's MSN Messenger Service display name.

i don't have the time to really say what i want to say. but put simply:

do all children in Las Vegas grow up learning that it is OK to gamble? don't blame the effects of poor parenting on environmental variables that, frankly, have little effect on how your kid is brought up. where in the world can children be brought up without temptations and threats? the greater issue is making sure your kid is in a place where he doesn't feel the need, want or desire to give in to temptation or yield to threats. if you feel so strongly about having a casino in your backyard, move. it can't be helped if you can't parent, or your kids decide that you can't parent, no matter where you live, and whether there's a casino next door.

take charge of your children and your families. don't use a weak excuse like this for the downfall of your sad society. singapore and singaporeans may just be one big flock of sheep and herd of cattle, but to say that dropping a casino here is the apocalypse for us all is ludricrious. we are a nation with ever-populated Singapore Pools outlets, Turf Club booths and Star Cruises ships with casinos in them. what difference will this really make?

looking back on today

i am loving this song right now, i don't know why, but i am.

regarding the last two posts...

i put them up, because i originally scraped the paper in my sketch book with the full intention of posting whatever i wrote.

reading them now, i'm not sure i meant all of it. i know why i'm doing it. i'm just no longer sure the reason why is still worth it.

also transcribed from aaron's sketch book

for mosh, i went all the way back to Chuan Park to get the notes i took in my sketch book.

for mosh, i missed the last 853 to Geylang Lorong 1.

for mosh, i am now sitting on a bus stop along Boundary Road, like a terrific idiot.

why the fuck am i doing mosh?

transcribed from aaron's sketch book

why am i putting myself through all this crap?

oh, i'm not going to touch that one.

but, really, why is everything just so hard?

is it true that the harder you work for something, the more you enjoy it? i bloody hope not, because there has been many things i have worked myself to death for, but none that i ended up being able to enjoy.

to the point that i find that life is more bearable if you see it as a set of objectives, expectations, obligations. these are the right reasons for doing things. not friendship, love, care or concern. you don't want to die from living life, do you?

merde. merde, merde, merde.

the gmail invite that fawwaz oh-so-kindly sent to me has made it into my inbox. but after the frustration of confirming that userids have to be at least six characters, i got irritated to the point of nonsense when i discovered both "aaronkhoo" and "aaron.khoo" were taken. so i started being random with userid ideas. i tried names from The O.C. "ryanatwood" was taken, "sethcohen" was taken. i thought somemore and tried something else. i was just being cheeky with the system, really.

but now i'm sethulacohen@gmail.com

how many aaron khoos are there in the world?

choosing a gmail userid is hard. the limit is at least six characters, so aklw is out, and i can't seem to find anything suited to me. both aaronkhoo and aaron.khoo are taken.

random

the journey from Chuan Park to Temasek Polytechnic? is fucking abysmal.

i spent fifty minutes on service eight, and it wasn't a double-deckered bus either. and that's already having saved half an hour by having my mom drive me to toa payoh and drop me off near the bus-stop on her way to work.

i need sleep. i need coffee. i need to get out of here. i need to finish my class. i need to go to Tan Tock Seng after class. i need to go back to Chuan Park. i need to redeem Red Rewards and StarHub loyalty points.

but what do i want to do?

nescafe

in this ongoing class break that will end in five minutes' time, i have:

called kenneth to ask him about the wood he wants me to saw [though someone who failed Model Making last semster and must retake it now, which incidentally is the class i'm in the midst of now, isn't the best person to ask, but maybe i'm the only PID student he knows or feels comfortable enough with to ask?],

bought and drank a nescafe cafe latte iced coffee,

read ondine's blog, if only the lastest post,

downloaded four new [to me] Earlimart tracks,

and synced them to my iPod.

and, now, back to work.

dilemma

so, by being home over the weekend, i missed the fresh-from-the-oven rush for several television shows, sticking me with my eyes glazing over whilst i watch the ever-changing bitrate on the last one to finish. but i have school in about one hour. and today is a day where i have to wait three hours in the studio between my first class and my second class. if i bring my PowerBook out, i can entertain myself, but i would interrupt this, and i might never get a decent bitrate again. if i don't bring my PowerBook out, it might finish by the time i get back, but my entire brain might glaze over in the three hours at school.

what to do?

crashdown cafe

i arrived happy. going there and coming back wasn't the fastest way to get here, but hey, i wanted to do it and it was good for me. don't question or complain, okay? just... ride.

but, apparently:

it's not a good idea for me to bring my PowerBook home.

and i did, over the last weekend. my father knew already, which was really the end of it all. so what difference does it make that my mother and my other sister now know? i don't like lying, but even in telling the truth that i have a personal computer i've to tell them the lie that it's just a loan, of sorts, from my first aunt, because she's not using it and passed it to me. so i can't even live that little bit free-er and not have to hide everything and be sneaky around a place that i'm supposed to consider my home? i can't just leave my bag lying around instead of having to bring it with me, room to room, or lock it up, so no one will see the cat that everyone knows about anyway?

life might be happier if i didn't live in a home with people i'm related to. i can't wait to move out, or move in elsewhere, or with someone else. i can't even say anything, because i wasn't being berated, scolded, or argued with. i was being rationalized to, reasoned to, in even, reasonable tones that normally could invite debate, countering and negotiation, but experience has taught that this tone means: this is what i think is best for you, and you should not do anything else.

even the subtext isn't definite or controlling. but you know the meaning. and i definitely know the feeling.

sniff

my head hurts. my nose is running. i feel tired and achey. urgh.

I want to chase after you and throw my glass of cranberry juice on you

Because, you do not leave without saying goodbye.

i tell you...

... there is nothing more annoying now than the double-beep-beep of my 8910 or the low drone of its ringing.

you're wasting my life

good god it's three am and i need to sleep but i can't because i am purportedly waiting on an email from cheryl somebody who was supposed to have sent the email over twenty-four hours ago but is only texting me now to say that she's sent it and could i let her know if i didn't receive anything why can't people appreciate the fact that i can't work without the copy being provided to me first tomorrow i have to go to sim lim square to buy dax's new lcd monitor with him and install it and possible meet cheryl and fawwaz and go back to chuan park to pick up the eighth-inch mini-stereo to rca cable and possibly my new sim which has a crappy number and i don't think i want to use it should i tell people my new number there are some people i don't want to tell but to leave some people out of the rain would be too mean so i should either tell all or tell none man i need to sleep now.

Microsoft Publisher for Mac

why doesn't that exist? cheryl just called, and apparently no progress has been made on the programme for the ECGS party. i need a fast and simple desktop publisher that also gives me room to breathe and work in.

now all i have is PowerPoint. i can't procure [not to mention even learn] PageMaker, InDesign, or QuarkExpress in time. so what to do?

i just checked Mail, and her email's not made it through yet. i guess i'll be bringing my PowerBook out with me tomorrow, like it or not.

it was time.

or was it? i feel like throwing up, and that can't be good.

"it's like we're standing in the same room and he won't even talk to me."

i don't know what is thought about it, but i don't like signing on, saying nothing, and then signing off because nothing's been said.

and i've long tired of having to constantly make an effort to order to have just a sliver of conversation.

bonne nuit. i have school tomorrow.

suddenly...

i feel completely and utterly alone.

the onset of school, tomorrow, doesn't help, either.

e, motion, less

i had a lot to say. but now i just feel hollow and worn out.

just because i obviously didn't mean it when i said it doesn't mean it didn't hurt when i heard it. i kept switching my phone off and on, because the heart would rather believe that the phone was screwed up. the brain knew the SIM slot was dodgy, but it also knew it was more likely that the feelings you have for your own birthday were mutual.

i left in the middle of my own party. i'm not going to say something stupid, like that i can't even think of eating the paralines now because they seem to reek of smokes, but even though i know should eventually consume them, i can't, really. though, come to think of it--millions of people can't be wrong!

a nice dinner and nice gifts do not make a happy birthday. and let's not try again next year, because if i make it to the next one, i'm probably just going to disappear. you can't be disappointed if you remove all hope. it was what i was going to do this year, anyway. it's just that i knew that they put effort, time, and money into it. but this is fair warning. not everything needs to be a surprise.

i've been crushed, disappointed, had my heart broken, been pissed about and pissed off, had too much hope and suffered the letdown, and right here, moped, brooded, and quoted the simpsons.

this birthday is officially over. it's my party, and i'll cry if i want to.

now if only i could cry.

I've left

As above.

in other news...

PBF048BCTodayismyBirthday
Originally uploaded by aklw.

... BitTorrent has been slow for me of late.

there it goes

the wish for a quiet birthday. not neccesarily lonely, but quiet. go somewhere where no one knows it's my birthday, even if it's a Nanyang party. Nokia Care Center and AppleCare Center? sure, why not. chase paper, chase strangers, chase parts, chase titanium covers, PowerBook hinges, owed coffees and broken microphones.

i was going to see if there was any chance i could just go out, quietly, with one or two people.

he gave in before i ran out of evasiveness. calling and hanging up. very mature. also very clever, what with the advent of Caller ID and all. also, like i keep saying, mis-sent messages are very dangerous.

i could have gotten out of here if i wanted to, at any time. i mean, think about it. it's my birthday, they'd give up some time to let me out [after all, we're not talking about my father or my mother here], it's all dependent on whether i want to.

and do i want to? the answer is no.

i don't want to do the whole gather-a-ginormous-amount-of-people-and-blow-candles thing. how many people in that number can i consider my friends? or, in fact, how many should i consider my friends? do i know all the people present? do i really know anyone present?

i don't need that, ever. not in any time of my life do i need that. my birthday is no exception.

kenneth asked me if i was pissed. i told him weeks ago that, not that i was saying anyone was definitely going to do anything for me, but if you catch wind of anyone trying to, could you tell them not to? when he called and hung up, i got pissed off; not only were they trying to spring something onto me, kenneth was involved. but by the time he asked me i was done being pissed. so i told him that i wasn't pissed, only because i was telling myself not to.

what should i do now? go and fake it? or piss everyone off? i don't want to do either. that's why, even when xuan broke down and told me what he was trying to do, i still told him i didn't want to go over. even though my sister was going to come and look after my granddad. so why am i going? the time, effort and money expended. tell me what you want, what i should do, how i should act. because i know i won't do the right thing.

i already know jensen's not going to be there, because he's going to L.A. as for who else i would've liked to see there, if i had actually wanted this, well who knows. it's ironic that several days after deciding it and then deciding against blogging about it [it being my being fed-up with people contacting me solely for technical support], someone tries to play me out with just that. it matters not whether i thought i smelt a rat. even if i didn't, i wouldn't have gone. this, however, doesn't mean i mind doing technical support, in general. for some people, i am always at your service. but if you haven't talked to me in ages or don't talk to me normally, don't expect any favours, unless you're lucky and i'm feeling charitable when you ask. but you combine the recent desicion and my recent mood and no dice, xuan. and all this is assuming i didn't think i smelt a rat.

i'm tired. the irritation is still coarsing through my veins, and normally i would stand a better chance of spontaneously combusting or dying than falling asleep when i'm like this, but the steriod pill i'm trying out for my ezcema knocks me out completely. alors, bonne nuit et au revoir.

it's my party, and i'll cry if i want to.

a very queer goodbye

but i don't really mind.

AppleCare

so it was just a faulty AC adaptor. popped over to AppleCentre@Orchard to see what was wrong, and then went to the AppleCare centre at Ang Mo Kio to exchange the adaptor for a new one. and i got the last one currently in stock, too.

originally meant to go get my Nokia checked out at the Nokia Care Center in Wheelock while i was there, but jensen wanted to go grab lunch at Burger King whilst waiting for my number [129] to be called, but by the time we got back to the NCC they'd already called 130 and were calling 131.

my contact lenses suck. must do that protein removal thing tonight. had to go to that optical shop opposite Substance and buy a contact lens case and ask for them to squirt some solution inside so i could take out my lenses and wear my glasses. which part of my brain decided to bring glasses out but not the contact lens case?

and the return of BastardDad: last night when the money arrived he, very politely and nicely, called and told me to transfer a thousand to my mom's account and drawn four thousand so he could collect it tomorrow. when i told him i was going to take a thousand out of his four to buy the V3, he near blew up and went back to the same person who threw me out the house. i asked him what he needed four thousand for, and he said he needed "living expenses". which is read as "beer and betting money". his four grand won't last him four days. so, fed up with yet another broken promise [bet/Motorola Razr V3], i told him i won't be in tomorrow, and he would have to get it from whoever was in here. miffed, he asked where i was going tomorrow.

i told him, "what business is it of yours?"

so last night was the first time i spent two days in a McDonald's, waiting for midnight to arrive with my sister. we ate, sat, talked, i called jensen, and once it was past midnight i withdrew another two thousand to make the four. i returned every cent of the remittance to him, down to the last twenty-eight cents.

fuck off

so. today, my PowerBook broke.

and. my father refuses to give me the money he owes me for the V3. fuck him. i'll give him back all the money, down to the last twenty-eight cents.

and! during the current commercial break for singapore idol, the Motorola Razr V3 ad played.

ADDENDUMMOTO

it seems most of the Motorola range seems to appeal to me. even the basement-bottom, zero-functionality V180.

i officially denounce Sony Ericsson. i may still like your French-themed ads, but you can keep your squirrels, your crystalized keypads, your Memory Sticks, your queer swivel designs, your FM radios and especially your relegating of the yes/no interface to the basemennt-bottom phones. see you in a bit.

i still hate Nokias with a passion, though. i don't forsee that changing any time soon.

Intelligence Everywhere™

HELLOMOTO

odd how when i'm looking for a new phone, i keep going back to, in order of preference, either the V3, V80, V600 or E398. all are Motorolas, all are functionally identical and the last three cost exactly the same though all four are aimed at different markets.

odd. i guess my Ericsson Era is over.

wants and aspirations

if i were a version two Sim, i would have just acheived the fear of a bad phone call.

we used to be friends

we are not amused anymore.

here i am, bored on a tuesday afternoon, listening to house music in front of my PowerBook, which by the way is part of the reason why i was thrown out. no one to talk to, no good blogs to read, nothing to do. this ennui will probably carry on through the semester that begins in seven days.

life is indeed monotonous. and if not quite monotonous, then at least irritatingly cyclic.

the only things i have learned today are that i like my hair shorter, and that i like writing with a sharpie-type marker or felt-tip pens.

it's one more day before the abhorrent, loathsome, insipid, asinine month of december begins. i hate december.

life is indeed monotonous. and that's not really funny.

"i have nothing to say about this one."

my father just called and told me, in no uncertain terms, that i was no longer welcome at home.

and my heart, it's supposed to bleed? i'm upset about not getting the money for the Motorola Razr V3 now, but other than that i'm thinking of all the damage i'll do when i go home to get all my stuff, and i'm really, really happy.

for every action ... ... there is a reaction

"Amy?"

"Shhh!"

"Is everything alright?"

"Ephram just signed on! Right there! He sees me. And he knows that i see him, this is so insane."

"What is? What is going on with you two? I know that he came by the other night, that he left rather suddenly... What is it, sweetheart?"

[turns to look at HAROLD] "Everything's all messed up. It was good when he got home, at least I thought it was and then we got into this stupid fight. It wasn't even a fight, I don't even know what it was, all I know is that none of this would have happened if he hadn't had gotten that letter."

"There was a letter?"

"Yes, from Juilliard, apparently he got a really crappy evaluation from his summer programme, and now he says that he needs to practice everyday, and that he may not have time for a girlfriend, which is totally not true because I am really low-maintainence when it comes to that kind of stuff, you know?"

"Absolutely."

"See? I know! But he doesn't even want to hear it! And, now, I have to deal with tomorrow, my first day of senior year, and I don't even know if I'm in a new relationship or not."

[turns back to the computer] "It's like we're standing in the same room and he won't even talk to me."

"Amy, look away from the screen. Come on, you can do it..." [starts to chuckle]

sous la pluie

bloody hell, i hate talking to myself. i should also hate talking to someone about a girl who's too busy to hate him, and another who keeps changing her mind [do they have so many in stock?] about dating him, but i can't, so i'll settle for mildly irritated. but, bloody hell, i hate talking to myself. it isn't enough that i end up having to make an effort because you don't, i don't even get a response? bloody hell.

"bizarro day, huh?"

sunday:

jenghis's birthday. meet, wait, discuss, cuss, call, enquire, discuss, decide, discuss the location of the nearest cafe cartel, decide all over again, walk to marche, stop at lucky plaza, wait at lucky plaza, find out they already went to marche, holler at them over the Nokia, walk to marche, wait, get seated at a bench, wait, jenghis arrives, i order a diet snapple and matt thinks it's funny, they eat, we leave, they jack jenghis whilst i walk right over to fawwaz's gift-wrapping booth, all beats in place and counted for.

then we parted. half went to pool, fawwaz went back to his booth, matt went home, xuan and kenneth followed me shopping. evenrything was closed or closing. including Kennth Cole. closed. i just stared in through the window for a couple of seconds. then walked towards the Topman at Wisma Atria. and looked for something to buy. everything was either ugly, too cheap, or i didn't need it. in the end i decided on i-love-it-but-don't-need-it. a grey sandblast pinstripe blazer. pretty. and a hundred and twenty-three dollars. i charged it to my MasterCard and enjoyed the richness of it.

then xuan wanted to see a busker doing magic tricks. then xuan wanted a cookie from Coffee Club Express. so we went. and the iced cafe latte was rather good. then i called fawwaz, and we all met up and got onto the NEL and went home.

monday:

woke slightly late for the gallery. got up, showered, did whatever i could with my brother's wet-gloss gel [ew, and yes, i was at home], decided to bring my stuff with me so i can go to my aunt's direct, used the notebook case my aunt gave me, decided to wear the blazer i bought yesterday and stole my father's shoes. they hurt. but i looked good.

went to xuan's aunt's gallery. it was a nice place. too nice to hold mosh. things will break.

then followed fawwaz to The Heeren Shops to exchange Moby's Play for the De-Lovely soundtrack. i've been in town too many times this week. i'm starting to reek of town. yet after getting the exchange done at HMV, what do i do but pop over to Spinelli's for a Latte Spin?

after that, i headed over here. business as usual for a couple of hours. then my mom texts:

"Tomoro I'm doing e trade in of ür phone. which model ü wanted? N i nd ür tis phone n charger too..when ü b back here?"

no advance notice, no "so do you want to trade in your phone", nothing.

she just decides out of the blue that she's going to trade in the phone i've been using, without much of a plan as to what i'm going to use after she trades it in, except for this nugget she reveals when i call her, carefully concealing the fit i'm throwing:

"at the most i get the 6230 lor, because if later next few months you want something else then i can take that phone what. i don't like what siemens, motorola, samsung, sony ericsson one."

"i don't like nokias."

"aiyah, just anyhow use for one two months can one what."

i am not my siblings. i am not my mother or father. when i buy something, it is something i've decided i want to commit to for a while. it goes without saying that i won't buy anything i do not like. just because my brother changes mobile phones three times in the last year doesn't mean i will. i want a Motorola Razr V3. or a Motorola V600. neither of which my mom will let me buy, no matter how long i argue.

and what, i can't buy a Motorola because she doesn't like them, and i can't not buy a Nokia even if i hate them?

so. what happens? i buy the Nokia off my mother. she just wants the money. she's piss-scared that the value of the Nokia 8910 that i'm using now will depreciate further [what a shocker]. are you reading what i've typed? i've been driven to such desperate measures by my mother and my father that i've actually BOUGHT A NOKIA OFF MY MOTHER. and the most Nokian of all Nokias, no less.

so, after all that? my dad calls in the evening. drunk. wanting money from me. i ignore him and call my mother to notify her. she's even more piss-scared that i will give the $140 that's supposed to go to her to him. i hang up on both of them and go to watch TV.

that's it. i don't care how much it costs, but next month when more of my father's money comes in, i'm taking money out to buy a V3. i don't bloody care any more.

overture

The mind plays dirty tricks.

I'm having nightmares again.

a lack of color

I've failed.

These things happen? It's okay? Never mind? See you
in school? It will be okay? Shouldn't you be more
worried about your parents? Take it easy?

No.

I dont know what to do.

mix 2

I'm at HMV now, with jensen. And i've just spent sixty
dollars on three cds. It turns out i also tend to
spend when im in a good mood, though at least its less
than half what i spent on the same number of cds when
i bought stuff in bad mood. Oh. Wait. We might hit the
place at roxy square later.

earphoneless/microphoneless

someone up there must really hate me, because this is my new, permanent, phone: Nokia - Nokia 8910 Phone

irony: my unserviceable Ericsson had an earphone that got so soft i can so longer hear anyone on the other line unless i'm in a library-like place. this Nokia has a microphone that doesn't work.

Nokia: Connecting People
Ericsson: Make Yourself Heard
Aaron: Bloody Pissed Off

"Okay, I know you don't like it, but that is one snazzy phone"
-Lin Hongxuan, 17

paris in new york

i think i'm getting old. i've never quite felt like this, going back by myself, before.

the ties that, unfortunately, bind

they made my grandpa wait over a hour.

for their silly tea ceremony.

OilyMan and ChihuahuaFace.

and nary a red packet.

Digital SLR and DV camera.

dinner tonight at seven PM, Shangri-La Hotel.

like, ew.

the way we were

morning - afternoon:
brunch at Crystal Jade Palace Restaurant, Ngee Ann City

afternoon:
watch The Way We Were and Adam Brody's appearance on Late Night With Conan O'Brien

afternoon - evening:
taking a long look at dax's PC, inclusive one hour of Malcom In The Middle and The Simpsons

evening:
head back here to shower and restore my iPod, whose music filesystem apparently got corrupted

evening-night:
met the guys at rogue. xuan danced. yes, really. you can call me and ask for details if you don't believe me

now:
back here, way too early, tying up the loose ends i left on my PowerBook after rushing out when i was done restoring my iPod

tomorrow morning:
cousin jeffery's wedding tea-ceremony

tomorrow evening:
cousin jeffery's wedding dinner at Shangri-La Hotel

okay. i need some sleep.

the way we were

my PowerBook is stashed under a few pillows, inside my bedroom, because my dad is here.

he decided to come visit.

the second episode, broadcasted, ripped and ready, awaits.

i hate my father.

the firefox has landed

Mozilla Firefox 1.0 has arrived. the entire site damn near went down at launch, i waited nearly five minutes to load the front page. then the download took forever, was five times bigger than it was supposed to be, and i had to re-download it this morning. it looks good, i already know it works excellently, but i prefer Safari. because using Firefox over Safari seems like Apple defection. and Firefox looks good, but it looks good in a iBook/iMac way. not that there's anything wrong with that, but Safari, with it aluminium skin, is more PowerBook/PowerMac. and if i can't have an aluminium phone [see below], i will damn well have an aluminium browser.

psycho aaron is open for business

if wayne turns out to have bought a V3, i will kill myself.

at least, internally.

i can't stand it. I CAN'T FUCKING STAND MY BROTHER HAVING THREE PHONES [COUNT THEM - NOKIA 7250, SONY ERICSSON T610, SONY ERICSSON K700I] IN ONE YEAR WHEN I HAVE HAD THE SAME ONE PHONE FOR THREE YEARS. I CAN'T STAND MY FATHER BEING A FUCKING BASTARD WHO CAN'T AFFORD ANYTHING BUT BUYS EVERYTHING, YET HE DOESN'T INDULGE ME WHEN I WANT A NEW PHONE, WHEN MINE HAS BEEN SUBMERGED THRICE AND HAS A SPEAKERPHONE THAT MAKES EVERYONE SOUND LIKE XUAN WHISPERING INTO THE PHONE BECAUSE THE VOLUME KEY GOT BROKEN OFF WHEN MY MOM HIT ME ON THE HEAD AND I DROPPED THE PHONE. I HATE THAT WAYNE'S GOT THE ONLY PHONE I LOVE NOW, I HATE THAT HE WON'T TELL ME IF IT'S TRUE. I HATE NOT BEING ABLE TO GO OUT WHENEVER I WANT, EVEN IF MY MOTHER LETS ME AND PRACTICALLY WANTS ME TO GO OUT MORE. I HATE FAILING EVERYTHING, I HATE SCHOOL, I HATE MY MASTERCARD WITH THE PRACTICALLY INVAILD SIGNATURE ON THE BACK. I HATE MY AMAZAON SHOPPING CART WITH OVER A HUNDERED US DOLLARS' WORTH OF CDS IN IT. I HATE MY POWERBOOK, I HATE MY WIRELESS MOUSE. I HATE NOT HAVING MY PHONE WITH ME AND HAVING TO USE MY AUNT'S FUCKING NOKIA 3315, BUT NOT WANTING TO GET IT BACK FROM XUAN BECAUSE I NEED A REASON TO GET OUT TO WATCH A FUCKING MOVIE. I HATE EVERYTHING.

i have nothing but hate. if you don't have anything nice to say, FUCK OFF OR GO FUCK YOURSELF.

w00t?

it's official. the word "woot" is now irritating. especially since it originated as "w00t" and has been "corrected" to become a "real word".

iBetter Exchange

iBetter Exchange - Creativex.Creative.Com

riiight.

and this is all that's left

what exactly is, i do not know.

right back where we started from

i feel very, very happy. the last time i felt this happy was, oddly enough, only two hours ago, though that was the first time in over a week, if not more. but. i just watched The Distance. and i feel lightheaded with glee and happiness. there is only one word to describe how i feel now, and that word is "squee". because that's the sound i feel like making, over and over again.

tomorrow, the super mondo party, possibly of my year. at least i'll be able to rewatch this if i freak out and melt down again. which i will try not to.

squee!

cellular

chong chorming: stop using a Nokia.

his Nokia called my mobile just now and left a very long voice message. and when i called back, he said no one did.

okay. whatever.

the distance

the second season of The O.C. is broadcasting in California now. i cannot wait.

isn't it ironic?

Nokia goes after impersonators Sagem and Vitelcom - Engadget

like, totally.

Nokia: Emulating Others

Nokia’s new cameraphones: the 3230 and 6020 - Engadget Cellphones

i'm having trouble finishing my Design Methodology supplementary paper--mostly with finding the two thousand words needed.

so here's a snapshot of two of Nokia's lastest phones, the designs of which i find, shall we say, "interesting". the 6020 resembles a Sony Ericsson T630 with only opaque plastics [i wonder if it comes in black--what a shocker - it does.]. as for the 3230, surely i don't need to tell you what that looks like, do i?

the political compass

The Political Compass

i went and did this again, just to make sure.

Economic Left/Right: -2.75
Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: -5.64

in other news, Bush won, i missed the deadline for the Color re-sub, feel like shit, had a two-thousand word essay in front of me but got nothing into Microsoft Word, even by five AM, woke today at four-plus PM, and have sat around in bewildered confusion since.

also, does anyone else also feel that today's Straits Times front page article is rather Bush-biased? i only skimmed it, because one cannot look at a photograph like that for any extended period of time without developing a medical condition of some sort, but that's the vibe i got. from several seconds' skimming.

aren't the balls getting a little heavy, Singapore?

welcome to stepford

The Play Pen for My Thoughts: The Trophy Wife

i'm sorry, but, ondine? this just sounds really, if pretentiously, cool.

in other news: it appers W is winning. sad.

duosyllabic phrases

i have finished my Communicating Design Ideas re-submission paper, which is due in nine-and-a-half hours.

i feel like i spent a year writing it, it was so hard to really concentrate.

i need to go to sleep, now, possibly listening to Yankee Hotel Foxtrot.

if you really love me, you'll let me go home

the last time i went to xuan's, two Saturdays ago, i stuck my neck out. i told my first aunt i was going to celebrate three friends' birthdays, and i would be back late that night.

of course, i stayed over and came back the next afternoon. wiped out from matt's drinks and depressed, i took a shower and asked when my first aunt would arrive for dinner, because i wanted to take a nap. rosemarie said she didn't know, but i could just go ahead and lie down.

i woke up past seven PM. i found a text message on my phone from my second aunt, telling me to explain to first aunt that it rained heavily that night, and my friend's mom told me to stay the night, so i called back here and asked if i should, to which my second aunt told me i should, none of which was true. my aunt was already there, and she mildly berated me for not telling her that i wasn't coming back here that same night.

later on she spoke with my aunt-of-sorts and it was decided that if i was going to stay out past midnight or stay over elsewhere, either she or my mom should know, "in case anything should happen to me". my aunt-of-sorts came over to my room after and told me what happened, then also told me she'd called here from Malaysia five times that morning and afternoon, reminding rosemarie that my first aunt would be here, at five-thirty, for dinner. i don't know what the implications of her choosing not to tell me that when i asked her were, but i chose to just let it go. no point dragging up even more ugliness. that was nuclear fallout one.

the in-between was me finding out i'd failed six of my seven modules and being assigned six re-submissions; also, though no one told me until Saturday, my father came back.

last Saturday i decided to sod it all and arrange to go to rouge. out of everyone i asked--wayne, jensen, matt and xuan--only jensen didn't decline or cancel. so jensen and i went alone. it was a pretty good time, slightly marred by the notice of my father's return courtesy of my mother, until jensen's parents decided to go out and get him. after an odd time of events i ended up meeting his parents and having supper with me, talking about school, L.A., Las Vegas, Disneyland, cancer, old age, and many other things i can no longer remember. then, because jensen lived in Serangoon, his parents gave me a lift back to Chuan Park. i'd called Geylang and told them already, to which my aunt-of-sorts questioned the wiseness of going home when my father was there.

the next day my mom, my two sisters, my brother and i went to a sort-of housewarming at my grandparents-in-law's place in Toa Payoh. they moved out from my first uncle-in-law's after a huge argument/fight. my grandfather has had his foot amputated since i last saw him in hospital, and was in a wheelchair. my grandparents-in-law now live alone.

the same morning my dad came over here and spoke loudly of how late i got back the night before, when he didn't see me coming back at all, and i wouldn't even have entertained the idea of going back if jensen's parents weren't offereing a lift.

at five PM my aunt-of-sorts called, asked about where i was, told me my aunt was coming back for dinner, but it should be okay, i should go back to Chuan Park and come back to Geylang tomorrow. we got back home pretty late that night, my father smoking in the living room.

today i come back here, caught in and soaked to the skin by the all-out thunderstorm, to Geylang. it appears my first aunt was questioning my absence last night, when she came back from dinner after coming back from Milan. she also questioned the wiseness of leaving the house when my re-submission period wasn't over yet. now that i'm here, i'll see her when she comes over for dinner tonight.

having read all that, though, you still won't know how i feel at this exact moment until you've spent the time to steam-iron a shirt, shower, dress, head out, and then have to rush all the way through a thunderstorm, to keep up appearances.

i'm fucking sick of living here.

"i just want to go home
the novelty has worn off, we are
not amused any more
if you really love me
you'll let me go home

i just want to escape
i'm stuck in a Kodak moment
with people in the future, albeit
if you really love me
won't you let me go home?

i just want to go home

i ran all the way home"

- "I Ran All The Way Home", Black Box Recorder

The Sims 2 for Mac is coming soon

The Sims 2 for Mac is coming soon - Joystiq

thank you, thank you, thank you, but i'm broke!

the poor little rich attention whore is back

i've actually been posting to drafts the past few days. ones and zeros make up most of my life.

my MasterCard arrived. it's probably been around for a some time, just that no one's checked the mail in a while.

i signed it kind of, well, off. the first pen i used i did with a flourish, but it lacked ink. crucial factor in pens. the second pen i used had too thin a nib, and i was a bit frazzled from ruining my MasterCard, and the signature is wobbly. and doesn't cover the faint signature from the first signing.

sigh. and i was so excited. never mind that i have only thirty dollars in my account. after all, we are the poor little rich family, and i am the poor little rich boy.

"sucks to be you!"

ever had you face really burn up? not to the point of extreme pain and wanting to slice your cheeks off, but enough for you to want to die?

yeah. sucks to be me.

nokia: connecting who, exactly?

this month on Crimewatch:

Nokia: Connecting Theives!

it's like a Nokia commercial gone wrong. or right. one guy on a Nokia Wireless Headset HDW-2 buglarizes a flat while his lookout is connected to him on her Nokia Dual Headset HDD-1.

say goodbye to aaron khoo

ever since i moved my blog here, i've tried to keep the title of each blog entry to either the title or part of the lyric of a song. because i was no longer typing out the title, date and time fields of each blog entry, i didn't really want to spend time deciding on and putting aside a seperate field for whatever song i was listening to or had listened to that day. so i compensated by making it the title. not that anyone noticed or gave a shit. not that i asked anyone either, but i don't really think anyone did anyway.

i'm sort-of closing this blog. if i ever post again it will definitely be here. but last night when yet another part of my sky collasped on me i realized that what most people would call a friend and bitch about, or go to school, find a friend and bitch about, i post on to my blog. it's not like i don't want it to be on my blog or anything, if anyone here knows me you'd know that i firmly believe that all dirty laundry should be aired. loudly, and in the wide open. but for some strange reason i've had an epiphany that my blog shouldn't be its first stop.

i don't know if it's socially normal or acceptable to have someone on call to just bitch with. i don't really know anything about social norms. but whatever. my social circle's going to disappear from my sight soon, anyway.

this'll teach me to decide to want to call at half-past twelve.

Gilmore Girls: Season 5, Episode 1; Say Goodbye To Daisy Miller

so pack a change of clothes, 'cause it's time to move on

can you imagine no:
love?
pride?
deep-fried chicken?
your best friend always sticking up for you, even when i know you're wrong?

can you imagine no:
first dance?
freeze-dried romance?
five-hour phone conversation?
the best soy latte you've ever had,

and me?

i wanted to take a shot at a five-hour phone conversation today. but after being mildly berated i didn't really feel like trying anymore.

why didn't she just tell me that my first aunt was going to come over at five-thirty?

"i remember when the days were long
and the nights when the living room was on the lawn"

could have been listening to Photobooth after the train doors closed; i felt miserable while riding the train from Aljunied down to Kallang and walking back to my aunt's.

but had i known that it was all just going to go to heck like it did, i probably would've just let the bus do its thing.

it's a monstertrucker

life in mono: Popagandhi Warehouse (Bedroom) Sale

so, my two purchases from the above arrived today [which reminds me: must confirm receipt], and it was mildly disappointing because Daisies Of The Galaxy was the edited version. which means track seven is "It's A Monstertrucker" instead of the original "It's A Motherfucker".

it irritates me to no end, but i'm forcing myself to push it aside because i'll mostly be listening to it on my iPod anyway, and i can just go source a download of the original and slip it in place.

plus, aaron. remember that it was eight dollars. HMV wanted over forty dollars for it, even if it was the original, unedited version.

and all at once i knew, i knew at once

so. i am probably never going to wear that jersey again.

punk debutante

My Very Own Glob {Curiosa Felicitas}: Pay it all over the place

hee.

i didn't want anything more to do with the outside world

i hate the government. they are outside the block now, drilling/hacking holes on the outside wall of the lift shafts, and then filling them up again. according to the notice posted at places in the estate, it's called "repair". fuck off. what kind of repair is filling up holes you've just made in the wall?

i hate hate hate the fucking noise being made by the fucking construction workers who are working for the fucking government.

and before i go, another thing to gripe about. it took me six months, but suddenly i've realized living here [at my aunt's] "somewhat" restricts me. back with my immediate family, my mom would decide that i was going and chase me out the house whenever i told her i was undecided about going out somewhere with friends. like pool, or xuan's house, watching other people get wasted. i don't like going out, and she knows it, and she's worried i'll become even more introverted. not that she knows what that word means. but can i help it if i don't want anything more to do with the outside world?

you should have seen her last week when i told her i was thinking about going to Zouk, but thought it wasn't my kind of place. she told me that she didn't like it much either, but i SHOULD go so i could find out if it really didn't like it, how would i know unless i went?

now, though, even planning to meet patrick to buy the Sony MDR-EX71S in-ear earphones off him needs to be contrived and secretive and frustrating and troublesome, on more levels than one.

and now, i need to get ready to go. because therapy for my grandpa begins in forty-five minutes at the hospital.

i take my twist with a shout

so the Killers have invaded iTunes. only a matter of time, what with The O.C. taking them on. wonder how long before the Walkmen arrive on the scene.

also, the Cardigans have released an iTunes Originals album. which i cannot buy unless i have a billing address that's in the States [or somewhere in well-known Europe, but tracks are more expensive to Europeans, i think]. i want it. but i literally cannnot buy it. why, oh, why.

where's my MasterCard? i cannot wait two business weeks, damn it. and what, exactly, is two business weeks? Amazon stands to earn a lot off me once i get that MasterCard, and i want my CDs. now. even though it'll still take a week for them to arrive after i place my order. i've already given up making a list and deleted it because if i make a list i'll remember exactly what i want to order when i can order, and that will leave a very, very, very huge dent in bank account.

in other consumerist/materialistic/superficial news, i have decided to go to the Clarks store at United Square tomorrow to look for shoes that might fill up the hole that the pair of Kenneth Cole "Debt Free" loafers have left in my heart. look below for a link to see what those shoes look like, because those are a fine pair of shoes.

rich

Apple - iBook G4

Apple: i do not think it's funny that you update the iBook line so that it's more or less now a PowerBook in sheep's clothing, minus some add-ons most people won't need. the next PowerBook had better be the PowerBook G5. i don't think i could live with not having the fastest 12" PowerBook G4.

i'd've linked you to the main Apple page, which is all about the new iBook right now, but i didn't want to create a main link which would break later on and have people clicking on it and wondering what the new U2-edition iPod/60GB iPod with color screen and photo-sharing capabilities/updated PowerBook G4/PowerBook G5/whatever Apple decides to make me want next have to do with the updated iBooks. though if they next replace it with an updated PowerBook G4/new PowerBook G5 it would have relavance, but that would not be necessary as it would have its own post and rant to go with it.

anyway, if you really want to see the iBook on the main Apple page, it can't be too difficult to type "www.apple.com" into your browser, can it?

mad world

but one example of the sad state junior college students are in:

Romanticism: Ah, sweet freedom

waltz #1

An ant just crawled across the bottom left corner of my Palm Tungsten T. What the heck was it doing in/on my Palm?

Anyway. I just got back into bed from getting out of bed just to flip open my PowerBook and watch episode four of the fifth season of Gilmore Girls. Lorelai Gilmore is one amazing woman.

It's frustrating how some things change so much you no longer recognize them, some things won't ever change, and other things change so often you've learnt to recognize the change instead. Of course, none of you are going to understand this. I have too much too say and too little patience to work with the stylus on the ridiculously grippy screen protector for any extended period of time. palmOne really needs to come out with a Tungsten-series PDA that has a built-in keyboard, WiFi, doesn't look fugly like the Tungsten C, retains Bluetooth, and goes back to the slider form factor.

wet to set in one minute flat.

"Hey! You do not harass the voters. This is not Florida."

i love everything. i love to be around money

Kenneth Cole Online Store

god, i have extremely expensive taste. the only pair of shoes i want to buy, and they're three hundred singapore dollars [converted from the US online store's USD price, which means they may cost even more here]? wowzee wowza. and the name of the shoe's Debt Free. wait two weeks. if you still want them, then you can start thinking of ways to get them. it's a very good thing that i don't have a credit card, because they would be mine by now if i had one.

- "Andrew Ridgley", Black Box Recorder

drag your blanket blindly

Another reason to loathe Nokias: My last blog entry got chewed up, for no good reason. It was incredibly long, taking into consideration the fact that it was thumbed out on the abhorrent keypad of a Nokia 8310. Will this post escape this screen? Lets find out...

how to fight loneliness

I'm home again. I don't know why. I'm typing this out on my sister's mobile phone. It is a Nokia. Clearly, i am desperate. The Sims 2 CD-ROMs are with my brother. He is at my aunt's. I was supposed to be at dax's now, on the pretext of having sent my sister home from my aunt's and it being too late to catch a bus back. Matt's parents weren't keen on him bringing booze over to dax's, whatever that understatement's supposed to mean, so it was off, since i left all my cash at my aunt's and have fifteen dollars left in my bank account. I need to, want to drink, because the sky is falling again, and i'm falling with it. The bank's taking us to court. And after we're made homeless and penniless by this apartment of my dad's, the other one which we've only paid twenty percent of will be waiting in the wings, lawsuit waiting.

good i feel bad

I want to go back.

caught by the river

Can't sleep. I keep thinking about mimosas (the drink, not the plant, and i'm quite sure I've spelt it wrong) because i wanted to get one but ended up with a screwdriver. Ten points to whoever can guess why i wanted a mimosa. Must sleep. Busy day tomorrow. Can't sleep. Can't sleep. Must sleep.

we've had enough

So i'm lying on my back now, at xuan's house, listening to dax and xuan talk about secondary school. I've spent most of my available cash and bank balance today, on food, wine and, almost, song. I suddenly like clubbing. I found yet another place to check out for shoes. My Ericsson wants me to stop.

dice

Does this work? If you're reading this, then it must, i guess.

Who needs moblogs when you have a GPRS-enabled Ericsson T68m that will do email as well? Blogger, Ericsson and Palm are my heroes. For now.

I'm at home. There is no internet access. my iPod is plugged into the Panasonic CD Stereo System. I just finished playing The Sims 2 on the home Dell Dimension 8250 [which needs, by the way, more RAM & a better GPU. Sadly it will only take the rare and expensive RDRAM variety, and a good GPU costs lots], and now am writing this on my Palm Tungsten T, connected to the internet courtesy of my brother's Sony Ericsson T618. Why not my own Ericsson T68m? Because that bugger owes me. Big-time.

I should go to bed. May have to go out twice tomorrow before i head back to my aunt's.

- "Dice (featuring Beth Orton)", Finley Quaye

clint eastwood

as if the Hummer H1 & H2 weren't enough, what's left of the world's oil and the air in Los Angeles is now positively cowering in fear: the Hummer H3 has been found. ew.

Hummer H3 unwrapped

and after looking it up a bit, it appears Hummer is pitching this H3 as a mid-sized SUV, to compete with SUVs like the Cadillac SRX and BMW X3.

right. when the X3 would fit inside the SRX, and the SRX would fit inside the H3.

urban complex

you know what's depressing? looking at this:

Academic Affairs Office

- "Urban Complex", Maxis, from the SimCity 3000 Soundtrack

photobooth

i don't know why i'm thinking so much about this now, to the point of obsession. I got out of bed a hour ago, to watch the pilot of The O.C., because i said i would yesterday but forgot, and immediately after i finished watching it and went back to bed, i was thinking about the instances when i really thought that i was, if not "cool", then at least not an utterly depressed [and possibly repressed], complete social retard.

And one time that stood out was the day the 2003 "O" Level Examination results came out. I wore my Levi's jeans and a brown Esprit short-sleeved shirt printed with a snowboarder motif. Total value: easily eclisped two hundred dollars.

It wasn't the results themselves [but i did get an A1 in english language, frankly all i wanted, even if the rest of my grades were dismal], and what i wore was only a part of it. Cause after the whole shindig in school matt, xuan, jiun, someone i've forgotten and i went to the Cafe Cartel along East Coast Road and had lunch. We talked about results, they talked about junior colleges, matt told me i should try for Law & Management, i noticed that Gilmore Girls was showing on the television sets they had inside Cafe Cartel,

After lunch we [matt, xuan & i] made plans to meet at Somerset later for a gig that was playing at The Third Place. I had no idea where that was, and i'd never been to a gig before.
all i knew was that i wanted to go.

But it was hours away. And if i had to go home and be alone to wait it out i know that i wouldn't be able to make myself leave the house again. So i thought of places to crash. School was out, matt's was out, i decided to head into the city by myself and see if there was any of my interest to be held there.

I ended up mooching about library@orchard, a subway stop down from Somerset. When five o'clock came i headed down to Somerset and met up with matt. finding out xuan was going to be late, we headed to the Burger King across the road from the station, where i bought a large iced lemon tea, we chatted, and matt played Billards on my Palm.

When we found out xuan was going to head there on his own [his jam session with some people i didn't know ended late], we headed off in search of the bus service he told us to take, crossing two roads to get to the bus-stop on the other side of Somerset station. we couldn't find it. decided that it was probably to be found a stop downstream, so matt and i trudged through the foliage on the side of the road to get to the bus-stop down the road. you weren't supposed to be walking there, and i can just imagine the numbers of drivers, headlights dazzling the bushes, wondering that the two teenage boy making their way along the road, half on the dirt, half on asphalt, were trying to do. besides trying to maintain my balance on the dirt and trying to to fall, i was also looking up the bus service on the internet, on my Ericsson. i kept getting an error message saying that the service was not found, and i told matt, "if we get there, and it's not there, we're taking a cab."

matt was all, "really?", and when we got to the bus-stop and found that the service wasn't available there, i dragged him to the Wisma Atria cab-stand to wait for a cab. i remember seeing a Lexus ES300, matt saying that "it's a fucking Camry!", and i said something that must have sounded inane to him about how the Toyota Camry and Lexus ES300 are basically the same car underneath their skins, save for the engines, and then we got into a cab. the was the whole thing about how "Outram" should be pronounced, both matt and i thought OUtram, but it was only when, in exasperation, i tried OUTram that the taxi driver understood me. and then he though matt and i were japanese or korean tourists. ew.

then it was getting there [i paid for the cab ride, not that i minded, just in case anyone out there thinks i shouldn've paid for a cab ride i suggested, i did, okay?] the gigs, my nosebleed in the middle, leaving, walking a distance to Great World City, eating at the McDonald's there that was about to close, taking a cab ride, dropping matt off at City Hall, dropping me off at Chuan Park, and then the cab making a u-turn in Serangoon Avenue Three, receeding into the distance with xuan in it, signalling the end of the evening.

everything from arriving at The Third Place onwards was better fleshed out in the original blog post i made, which i am going to dig out and post here just because it's special. i just wanted to make a note to remember it, and look where that went. oh, and yeah. that bus service that xuan told us to take that night? terminated a long time ago.

found it, and posted it. click on the title of this post to access it, alternatively click here.

"I remember when the days were long
And the nights when the living room was on the lawn

Constant quarreling, the childish fits
And our clothes in a pile on the ottoman

All the slander and double speak were only foolish attempts to show you did not mean
Anything, but the blatant proof was your lips touching mine in the photobooth

And as the summer's ending
The cold air will push your hard heart away
You were so condescending

And this is all that's left
Scraping paper to document
I've packed a change of clothes and it's time to move on.

Cup your mouth to compress the sound
Skinny dipping with the kids from a nearby town

And everything that I said was true
As the flashes blinded us in the photobooth

Well I lost track and then those words were said
You took the wheel and you steered us into my bed

And soon we woke and I walked you home
And it was pretty clear that it was hardly love

And as the summer's ending
The cold air will rush your hard heart away
You were so condescending

And this is all that's left
Scraping paper to document
I've packed a change of clothes and it's time to move on

And as the summer's ending
The cold air will rush your hard heart away
You were so condescending
As the alcohol drained the days

And as the summer's ending
The cold air will rush your hard heart away
You were so condescending

And this is all that's left
The empty bottles, spent cigarettes
So pack a change of clothes, 'cause its time to move on"

- "Photobooth", Death Cab For Cutie

hidden track

so. i've gotten all the way to Tuesday, May 13th, 2003. but i have yet to do anything about the last time i was home.

time for bed.

falls apart

Blogger Help : What is BlogThis! ?

cool. though what use i have for linking the five people who read my blog to some random site that i am reading at the moment i clicked "BlogThis!", i do not know.

okay. now back to transferring my old archives here, and reliving my old life, to see if this current bit is any better than the old ones.

the taste of ink

to the guy who wrote the Hyundai Tuscon ad:

i think that, if the guy driving the Tuscon had refilled the ice-cube tray and replaced it in the refrigerator before leaving, the ice would have been ready by the time he returned from wherever he drove to to find an icicle for his drink.

plus, icicles? you don't know where the water that formed it's been. ew!

bad Hyundai. bad, bad Hyundai.

california

i'm so behind.

can i even be considered to be behind if i only found out about it at a time when i would already be behind if i started on it right away, anyway?

but, whatever. see, someone [i cannot remember who it was, or even where i read it] came up with the idea to watch an episode of The O.C. for each of the twenty-seven days left running up to the season two premiere.

there are only twenty-four days left. i'm behind. but i've got other shows i've not watched yet, like four episodes of Everwood, one-and-a-half episodes of Lost, one episode of Will & Grace, and one not-yet-downloaded episode of Desparate Housewives.

and this's leaving aside the multitude of real-life problems i have yet to handle yet. but considering i wanted to kill myself over the weekend, i think i'll take this week off. now if only my mom, dad, plus various countless unmentionables, would let me.

the best things in life are free, but you can give them to the birds and bees, i want money

i have yet to collect my thoughts about the last few days, because i didn't have the time, or the internet connection [i was home again], but before it expires, quick, quick, go read this:

Chinese national awarded $1m in suit against S'porean - OCT 8, 2004

the Mr Khoo in the article is my third uncle. hi-la-ri-ous.

just shut your mouth

i had to go home over the weekend.

'nuff said.

god bless t.v.

i need to watch something that's light, dark, romantic and destructive.

thank god i own a copy of Jeux d'enfants. i am still pissed as hell that it won't play in my PowerBook, but i will be watching it again tomorrow when i get back.

right now, as a placebo, i need to watch myself some television. something that'll either make me cry my heart our, or laugh out loud. or warm my heart so much wish i was living that life instead.

because right now i feel like i'm falling off the side of a building [but, please, not like that Evanescence promo video], and i i'm thinking and hoping that the someone i want to catch me is there to the point where i'm dreaming, and it feels like it's going to be okay, because i am being caught by that someone.

and then i reach the sidewalk. no one's there.

my little corner of the world

i want the soundtrack to the Gilmore Girls, Our Little Corner Of The World: Music From The Gilmore Girls, so badly that i need it now. must have it. because i know that someone else buying it for me is a complete, utter, so-not-going-to-happen thing, i'm going to have to find and buy it myself. but it's not available anywhere i've looked. not that i've looked all that hard, but something as good as this should be widely available. at least until i buy it.

i might ship it off Amazon if i get desperate. HMV will probably charge me an obscene amount of money to import it [imports are already $40+, and those are the imports they brought in of their own accord], plus i can get Daisies From The Galaxy at the same time, probably [and hopefully] for less, too. i think i am getting desperate already. but i don't have a credit card! sigh.

also: when are Music From The OC: Mix 2 and Mix 3, the Chrismukkah compilation, arriving? i want them now. i want to listen to Maybe This Christmas now. i don't want to have to wait until chirstmas. why should i listen to it only during christmas? so what if i want to listen to a christmas song OUTSIDE of christmas?

this post brought to you by the lastest antics of my "parents": my dad reporting my mom's holding his passport to the police and landing themsleves in Family Court.