the tan family goes to SITEX

MOTHER TAN: [points towards iBook on display at the Apple stand] That one iPod, har?

APPLE-HIRED ASSISTANT: [excitedly] Yes!

i have lost quite a bit of hope that one day Apple will re-educate the world and take over the Wintel universe, considering the kind of hired help they get for shindigs like SITEX, even if it's temp staff.

and, no, MOTHER TAN isn't my mother. my surname is Khoo. less common than the dime-a-dozen Tan. my mom actually knows what an iPod is and looks like, though her eyebrows shot past her forehead and brushed the cheap fabric ceiling of our Suzuki Swift GL when i told her that it costs eight hundred dollars.

turns out the Saab i thought was a new addition to Chuan Park wasn't. it's disappeared, though i'm not sure when. however, it would appear that someone's bought a black Hyundai Tuscani, the Korean excuse for a coupe, and parked it next to the resident lesbians' black Toyota MR2 roadster. très original.

un jour et compte

"I would die for you
I would die for you
I've been dying just to feel you by my side
To know that you're mine

I would cry for you
I would cry for you
I will wash away your pain with all my tears
And drown your fear

I will pray for you
I will pray for you
I would sell my soul for some thing pure and true
Someone like you

See your face every place that I walk in
Hear your voice every time I’m talking
You will believe in me
And I will never be ignored"

- "#1 Crush", Garbage

watching Chicago is much more difficult than i'd imagined.

mariah, james and andrew carey.

my VCD copy of Chicago skips like crazy. i thought i could get by on just the audio track after Roxie Hart started dancing like a derivsh on drugs, jumping all over the wide expanse of my LCD. then the audio track screwed up as well. it thought it was the cheap-ish Wearnes DVD player, but then i remembered exactly what kind of VCD it was. the bloody thing left me hanging after Cell Block Tango.

time to call in DVD-loaning favours.

if you'd have been there, if you'd have seen it, i betcha you'd have done the same.

PAE briefing tomorrow. i don't know what the hell i'm going for, except maybe to wait for the party to be over.

daria, helen, jake and quinn morgendoffer.

"Lord knows he ain't got the smarts

Now he's shot off his trap
I can't stand that sap

Look at him go
Rattin' on me
With just one more brain
What a half-wit he'd be

If they string me up
Well, I'll know who brought the twine

That scummy,
Crummy ,
Dummy,
Hubby of mine"

- "Funny Honey", Rene Zelleweger

.oO

Trying hard to fit among you
Floating out to wonderland
Unprotected
God I'm pregnant
Damn the consequences

When I grow up
I'll be stable
When I grow up
I'll turn the tables

Blood and blisters
On my fingers
Chaos rules when we're apart
Watch my temper
I go mental
I'll try to be gentle

When I grow up
I'll be stable
When I grow up
I'll turn the tables

- "When I Grow Up", Garbage

Welcome to Chuan Park.

I HATE MY IDIOT, GOOD FOR NOTHING, CHEATING, LYING, ARSEHOLE OF A FATHER.

Welcome to Chuan Park.

Please beware of the sexually perverse and the outbreak of Dengue Fever [DF]. For your information, your family's bikes have already been stolen. Also, to avoid the frequent need to re-acclimatize to noise pollution, the following construction projects in the immediate vinicity will be carried out in overlapping time frames:

Nanyang Junior College,
Amaranda Gardens Condominium,
Goldenhill Park Condominium,
Lorong Chuan Station, Circle Line Stage 3.

We expect the first three projects to complete end-2003 or early 2004, after which the construction of Lorong Chuan Station will continue, until the year 2010.

The schedule for the construction company [Sato Kogyo (S) Pte. Ltd.] to invade your homes and take photographs of your unit to 'record the condition of buildings in the vicinity of the new MRT station prior to the start of construction works.' is already in your mailbox.

We wish you a plesant stay in Chuan Park.

what kind of IDIOT, GOOD FOR NOTHING, CHEATING, LYING, ARSEHOLE takes a look at the assorted Nissan Cefiros and Toyota Corollas here and decides that this is a decent place?

MY IDIOT, GOOD FOR NOTHING, CHEATING, LYING, ARSEHOLE OF A FATHER.

the same fucking IDIOT, GOOD FOR NOTHING, CHEATING, LYING, ARSEHOLE OF A FATHER that gambled and spent enough money away to have to sell, collectively:

one BMW 520i Individual,
one Nissan NX Coupe,
one Mazda 323 Astina,
one Saab 9000CD,
and one 5-room, 20th storey, city view, Toa Payoh HDB apartment

total value? estimated to be roughly two million singapore dollars.

i come home today, after bombing all over my Geography Paper Two, to find my bike gone. the chain and lock was on the ground, chain in pieces.

this place is fucked up. my IDIOT, GOOD FOR NOTHING, CHEATING, LYING, ARSEHOLE OF A FATHER's idea of a peaceful, decent place. and all this because the IDIOT, GOOD FOR NOTHING, CHEATING, LYING, ARSEHOLE needed to make a blatant statement of wealth and hence decided a HDB apartment is beneath him.

and he's coming back this week, supposedly. i say supposedly because he's been 'coming back' for months on end since June.

there are HDB estates safer than this cesspool of desperate thieves and perverts.

I HATE MY IDIOT, GOOD FOR NOTHING, CHEATING, LYING, ARSEHOLE OF A FATHER, AND I HATE THE GENERAL SHITLOAD OF SINGAPORE'S POPULATION THAT OCCUPIES THIS DUMP.

THE LOT OF YOU CAN GO FUCK THE FUCKING FUCK OFF.

and now, back to your regularly scheduled programming.

"I can't use what I can't abuse
And I can't stop when it comes to you

You burned me out but I'm back at your door
Like Joan of Arc coming back for more

I nearly died
I nearly died
I nearly died

I came to cut you up
I came to knock you down
I came around to tear your little world apart
I cam to shut you up
I came to drag you down
I came around to tear your little world apart
And break your soul apart

You burn and burn to get under my skin
You've gone too far now I won't give in
You crucified me but I'm back in your bed
Like Jesus Christ coming back from the dead

I nearly died
I nearly died
I nearly died

I came to knock you up
I came to cut you down
I came around to tear your little world apart
I came to rip you up
I came to shut you down
I came around to tear your little world apart
Break your soul apart

I nearly died
I nearly died
I nearly died

I came to cut you up
I came to knock you down
I came around to tear your little world apart
I came to shut you up
I came to suck you down
I came around to tear your little world apart
Tear your little world apart
Tear your little world apart
And break your soul apart

I can't stop when it comes to you
I can't stop when it comes to you
When it comes to you
When it comes to you"

- "Vow", Garbage

you think that's where it's at, but is that where it's supposed to be?

if you feel like you've seen read what you're about to read somewhere else before, it's because you have: what happens if something happens to your O Level examination paper?

i've been pondering this for some time now, and it suddenly became a lot more real when there was a mix-up in the collection of the Cheenese Paper Two on Friday - the same few teachers that didn't know how to operate the barcode scanners [that's what Aloyisus, the technician, was there for] collected Paper Two in a fashion that caused them to count, recount, check with the students, ensure that out papers were collected by the teacher with the bunned-up hair, count again, before letting us go whilst still fussing over the large stacks of paper.

what happens if Pat, the other people down the row and i have had their papers misplaced? anarchy at OneNorth?

i'm getting this strange feeling in my gut and in my head - i'm getting nowhere, and am going nowhere. what am i studying for? i can't answer questions pertaining to my future career or even what course i want to take in Poly, why i don't want to go to JC, etc. i'm a nowhere man, making my nowhere plans, to go nowhere.

i haven't, for example, decided that i want to become an academic driving my Mercedes-Benz E200 to and from NUS back/from a restored shophouse along Upper East Coast Road.

what happened to the me that wanted to become an airline pilot, driving a rosso barchetta 1987 Ferrari F40 and living in whichever building took over Shaik Maderseah Lane? I think he died when the lane was demolished.

what happened to the me that wanted to drive a metallic grey 2002 Saab 9-5 Aero Sportswagon, communting between my apartment at the Paterson Edge and my law office in Shenton Way? something happened last year. died in a car crash, i think. the offending cars seemed to be a red Suzuki Swift GL and a silver Hyundai World Coupe.....

what happened to the me that wanted to drive a matt black 1986 Saab 900S Cabriolet, working as a creative in an ad agency, copywriting [if that's the term] on my 15" Apple PowerBook G4 in Soho, London?

"Now, you sure you're not getting your hopes up?"

"'Course I am, that's what hopes're for."

unlike the masses, i dread the day the O Levels are over. that's when my fate is sealed, though i haven't a clue what kind of fate i want.

i've a little less than a week left. i seriously need help with my Elective History. something's gone wrong with my Geography. no use crying over spilt milk. they always say to picture something you really, really want at the end. how does that work out if you don't know what you want, or no longer want anything?

"Hey... Jaded
You've got your mama's style
But you're yesterday's child to me
So Jaded
You think that's where it's at
But is that where it's supposed to be
You're gettin' it all over me
X-rated

My my baby blue
Yeah I been thinkin' 'bout you
My my baby blue
Yeah you're so Jaded
And I'm the one that Jaded you

Hey... Jaded
In all it's misery
It will always be what I love... and hated
And maybe take a ride to the other side
We're thinkin' of
We'll slip into the velvet glove
And be Jaded"

- "Jaded", Aerosmith

the philosophy of Froot Loops

i'm eating softly-toasted tuna, olive oil and butter sandwiches as i tap-and-drag this entry out on my Palm Tungsten T. being handy in the kitchen has its benefits.

i spent about three hours in the kitchen this evening, helping bake and juice up cookies, muffins, brownies, pies and lemonade for my youngest sister's charity shindig later today. it's supposed to be in the aid of the Straits Times Pocket Money Fund. i feel like i'm the parent here or something - this, like running around countless neighbourhoods and Popular Bookstores for my siblings' schoolbooks last December, seems to be going above-and-beyond the duties of a "big brother".

SAMARIA: "how much longer before the brownies ready?"

LELANIE: "you sitting there watching the oven, you cannot tell is it? i'm washing the dishes here you - ohmygod what is that smell?!"

SAMARIA: "what smell?"

LELANIE: [pulling brownie tin hurriedly out of the oven] "ohmygod, burnt already, you see lah!"

yes, Lelanie is our maid. don't laugh at her - she uses a Motorola E365, with intergrated VGA digital camera, polyphonic ringing tones and a 65, 536-color screen, my personal reccomendation to her.

why are all the good movies always rated R(A)? i want to watch Kill Bill. i want to watch the Spanish Apartment. pirated VCDs, here i come.

i recently discovered Froot Loops came in green as well. green?! what conceivable flavor is that? leaf-juice? i leave Froot Loops alone for a bit and they go wonkers. is there some sort of commitee that decides new cereal colors? which was the fool that decided green was good for Froot Loops?

maybe i should listen to those TV ads which state estatically that a particular is available at 'All Good Music Stores'. i couldn't find Absolution by Muse anywhere in Toa Payoh. ended up buying Parachutes by Coldplay first. took me another few days to decide i wanted to commute to the 'Edge' at Parco Bugis Junction to buy Absolution. at least, having heard the CD, it was worth it.

"change everything you are
and everything you were
your number has been called

fights and battles have begun
revenge will surely come
your hard times are ahead

best, you've got to be the best
you've got to change the world
and use this chance to be heard
your time is now

don't let yourself down
and don't let yourself go
your last chance has arrived"

- "Butterflies & Hurricanes", Muse

someone in Chuan Park bought a Saab

yes, it's true. imagine my shock. there exists one other person possessing good taste in Chuan Park. i haven't seen the Peugeot 607 or the Alfa Romeo 147 since goodness knows how long, so they've likely disappeared. this leaves the Saab as the only non-tasteless car in Chuan Park.

my mum just came home with hair dyed several shades lighter than before. even she admits she looks like an ah lian, but she's ok with it.

MOM: [over phone to friend] "aye! wait until you see me then call me ah lian ok! don't anyhow ah-lian-ah-lian-ah-lian jing song like that okay!"

my brother also has decided that he wants to dye his hair for the duration of the end of year vacation. my mom is okay with that as well. what am i to do?

xuan's birthday came around on friday. here's a sampling of the gifts he got: a baseball bat, a protein shake consisting of 50 grams protein, and whipped cream down his underpants. the whipped cream didn't go so well, as it was likely very old; there was mold all over the cover and nozzle. plus, they broke the nozzle in the process of trying to hold him down for the kill.

that was after going for lunch with xuan and co. originally the plan was Thai Express, but when we got there it was still closed, hence we spent some time slumming it at Siglap Center McDonald's [i'm loving it!] and buying McMuffins either to justify/legalize our taking up three tables or to stave off hunger. later, we decided to just eat at the yong tau foo store near Siglap Center.

having gone through the period where my mother sold ready-to-cook yong tau foo at the Holland Village Wet Market, i've had enough yong tau foo to bust three-lifetimes' yong tau foo quotas. [believe it or not this was one of the better periods of my life. we even had a Saab 9000CD] but, to avoid being a whiny bitch on someone else's birthday, i went along with it.

trying hard to remember what i liked and what i didn't [actually what i didn't tend to throw up after eating], i grabbed five or six pieces to add to the collective plates, in case they favored the kinds of yong tau foo i'd rather not encounter again.

so imagine my suprise when we sat down to four large plates piled high with yong tau foo. each plate roughly the size of a typical QWERTY keyboard. and the auntie [i assume] running the place was kind enough to charge us a measly $5.50 per person, because it was xuan's birthday, and even quipped if we dared to come back again.

and, yes, i fell asleep during the O Level Cheenese Paper Two later on because i was too full.

apparently he will also be on the receiving end of a likely obscene t shirt on monday, for which i have contributed printing suggestions. wonder what the end result'll be.

makes me wonder what i'm going to do for my birthday, in twenty-five days.

"i think i'm drowning
asphyxiated
i wanna break this spell
that you've created

you're something beautiful
a contradiction
i wanna play the game
i wan't the friction

you will be the death of me
you will be the death of me

bury it
i won't let you bury it
i won't let you smother it
i won't let you murder it

our time is running out
our time is running out
you can't push it underground
you can't stop it screaming out"

- "Time Is Running Out", Muse