all hail the t-six-ten

SonyEricsson's found its breakthrough phone.

i won't buy a T610, unlike khooky, my two aunts and soon my brother, not because it's a bad phone, but because it's Nokian. this may very well be the biggest reason why it's so popular, but Sony's trashed exactly what i like about Ericsson. they've taken away the Yes/No interface on the higher-end models, making it that much more inefficent because they now need a Back key and can't have the Option key anymore, so they need to instate Nokian soft keys. the sum of the T610's parts is greater than the whole because the glue [interface] that holds them together has gone bad. they've yet to come up with a phone that i consider an upgrade to my T68m, hence i declined my mom's offer to upgrade my phone, passing the oppotunity to my brother.

it seems that Nokia really does rule the world. and we all know that those who rule, or are bent on ruling, the world are mostly evil.

one more thing, before i go to sleep. why do people put shit like "no mood to talk, prelims now" onto their blogs? i see entries reduced to one line, i see paras of mindless text. if you don't have anything to say, don't say anything.

"come and conquer and drop your bombs
cross my borders and kill the calm
bear your fangs and burn my wings
I hear bullets singing

and if you want me I’m your country
if you win me I’m forever - oh yeah!"

- "You're The Storm", The Cardigans

under the influence

the Khoo family has been partially disabled by the influenza virus.

somehow my mom came home one day last week coughing away, and younger of my two sisters promptly ran a fever of SARS-like porportions, sneezing away and wrapping herself in a blanket, sitting on the living room couch, staring blankly at the TV.

of course, i caught it from her, not realizing that i was especially tired and that my nose was running something fierce until after my physics exam, when i kept wiping my nose off the back my hand on the bus. don't retch. i do not carry tissues with me unless i am aware that i am not feeling well, and sitting on board an SBS Transit bus with mucus pooling on my upper lip was more of an evil than wiping it off the back of my hand.

so i went home, felt depressed, moaned, groaned and bitched about how i was feeling, took flu and vitamin C tablets, then went along for maths tuition which i desperately needed, impaired hearing [i was going "huh?" and "what?" the whole day] and lethargy or otherwise.

it was a horrible experience, because i scarcely got anything out of it, only managing to ask questions and try to memorize some formulae.

let me tell you that attending a Combined Khooky class is much more fun than staying in bed, unable to sleep. it doesn't help that when i try to do anything productive otherwise, because you're too tired to. this was proven by my falling asleep at my books, my couch, and my keyboard. if you think that's funny, than wait till it happens to you, and you end with painful prints of keys on your forehead and blocks of rubbish characters sent over to whoever you were talking to online.

"I’m an angel bored like hell
and you're a devil meaning well
you steal my lines and you strike me dumb
come raise your flag upon me

and if you want me I'm your country
if you win me I’m forever - oh yeah!"

- "You're The Storm", The Cardigans

never cried any, anyway

toyed with the idea of getting really hammered this evening.

didn't work out as planned. i've seen people drunk, and i'm nothing like that. last time i drank Hooch, i just became very serene, sitting on the couch as i watched the pricks that came around to my sister's birthday party mess up the apartment and get the floor all wet, creating a ruckus and too much noise. i just dropped everything i was picking up, snapped a bottle open without hesistation and just gulped it down.

there were people [sister's guests] younger than me, sitting in the corridor, sipping Hooches and Reefs, anyway. i still have that first all-to-myself bottle on my bedroom shelf.

didn't work out tonight. i got not much of a response from the one person worth telling who was online, and the rest were either snoozing or have blocked me. it's come to the point where i both care too much and not at all anymore.

three people i know recently got a SonyEricsson T610: Khooky, my aunt Esther and my aunt Jacq. Khooky i know made the [i hope] informed decision to buy his T610 in Abyss Blue instead of the dime-a-dozen Aluminium Haze, hopefully both my aunts were similarly inspired. and if it all goes to plan, my brother will trade in his Nokia 7250 [trade-in value $400] for a T610. right now i'm not sure what to make of my brother potentially having a better mobile than me.

more additions to our apartment: two Toshiba home theater systems [one for my mom's bedroom. can you say "overkill"?] and one 21" Toshiba flat-screen TV, to replace the 14" Thomson Life previously taking pride of place in my mom's room. the amazing thing about the Toshiba is that it has FOUR [4] speakers, but only MONO sound. and it doesn't even have teletext.

the Panasonic stereo system has been moved into my room, so i can now sleep to A Rush Of Blood To The Head played crisply over proper speakers, instead of blasting it through my tinny Sony backphones.

incidentally, Matt's two-hour-late decision [i waited for his opinion before buying. the CD store closed before i got there, in the end. non-instantaneous gratification sucks] of Coldplay over Robbie Williams when i texted him regarding a new CD purchase has led me to my decision to add Coldplay to my 'like' list. now it's Garbage, Coldplay, The Cardigans, The Cardigans pushed to third because i haven't actually bought any of their albums.

khooky's combined class today was interesting. sitting roughly between Matt and Khooky during such an event is like watching a good tennis match. swivelling eyballs abound, with the occasional snapping head. Mr Kenneth Wee [or KeWee as he is fondly called] just tells the class "don't listen to Matthias" and moves along. not very entertaining.

i probably got more out of those four hours than the entire week gone past.

i just got an IBM ThinkPad TransNote, but lack the means to charge it up, let alone boot it up. if anyone has a spare ThinkPad power adaptor...

i still want to go watch Down With Love. i'm just not ready to admit to myself that i'm sad enough to go watch a film alone, and being prelim time, i doubt anyone's gonna come along anyway.

my grandfather [mom's side] is still in the TTSH ICU, and i hear the success rate of a heart bypass operation is anyone's guess. the other grandfather's 93 years old. he's not around for much longer - recently fell ill a couple of times. however, his son isn't coming back to see him [for the last time?]

all this, right here, right now. somewhere, someone's going "if you had friends/if you were nicer to people ... "

what good will friends do now?

"I just don't care anymore
I've reached the end of the road
I just don't care anymore
Won't cry these tears anymore

Can't find it in the bible
Can't find it on TV
Can't find it in diamonds
There's something inside me that just won't allow me to
Find it in music
Can't find it in my soul
Can't find it in chocolate
Oh babe I can't hide it
I can't even find it in you

I just don't care anymore
I've reached the end of the road
I just don't care anymore
Won't cry these tears anymore

There's no way she can kiss you
The way that I do
I heard that you miss me
Oh you should be careful of who you keep talking to
Long nights without you have taught me to be strong
I've cut all my losses
Think no more about it 'cause I couldn't find it in you

I just don't care anymore
I've reached the end of the road
I just don't care anymore
Won't cry these tears anymore

There was a time I thought I'd die
If you should ever leave me high and dry
Now you don't want me any more
It's time to settle the score

I just don't care anymore
I've reached the end of my tether
I've torn all your letters up
I just don't care anymore
Won't cry these tears anymore

I just don't care anymore
I've reached the end of my rope
And it's time that I told you so
I just don't care anymore
Won't cry these tears anymore"

- "Can't Cry These Tears", Garbage

strike up the band and make the fireflies dance, silver moon's sparkling

[it's finally over]

my beloved family is now in possesion of three refrigerators.

one Sharp 3-door fridge, with seperate Freezer, Cooler and Crisper compartments, purchased in 1997 as a housewarming gift from my first aunt [father's side] for the Toa Payoh flat.
one Toshiba bar fridge, with combined Freezer, Cooler and Crisper compartments and Gravity Control system for the Healthy Cool cold water dispenser, purchased in 2003 with a discount from my fourth aunt [mother's side], who works for Best Denki.
one Akira wine cooler, with glass door, purchased in 2003, discount deemed unneccesary due to odious cheapness of product, but obtained anyway.

who needs three fridges? our wine is of the piss-water variety, and you don't cool bottles of XO, VSOP and Louis the 13th whatnot. i appreciate the cold water dispenser, but i have a bladder bigger than the three liters the water tank provides for. when she screams about the power bill next month, i'll consider smashing the Akira's glass door in.

i found a few 'i hate khoo kayyong' webpages while being bored online yesterday. coincidentally, most are also 'i hate matthias chew' webpages. also, one or two imply/outright declare matt and khooky homosexual dogs. hilarious reading.

while khooky is not having an allergic reaction to Teachers' Day, i certainly am. couldn't get my mask on this morning, and so i didn't get out of bed. i wasn't sure i wanted to witness the Shiny Happy People 2002 Edition make their inaugural pilgrimage from VJC to VS, considering it's enough of an effort to watch them head off into VJC land evey bloody morning, while on the last leg of your hour-long epic journey from Chuan Park to 2 Siglap Link, on board a crappy Mercedes bus emptied of its malicous payload of giggly, noisy, bitchy, dyky secondary and tertiary schoolgirls, listening to Garbage remind you that you should have, shouldn't have.

/don't end up in the gutter/just like the one before you/you're just the same/such a loser/

one of them contacted me later in the afternoon, asking if i saw the whole throng of us in vs today?

i had my mask on by then, so i didn't tell him to fuck off.

i did, however, tell Nicholas to fuck off, because he would not stop bugging me about whatever shit happened for Teachers' Day. i cannot be less concerned about the half-attempt to entertain all and sundry [teachers, students, liquorice allsorts] in school for the 'celebrations'. it probably worked out, which is what disgusts/disappoints me.

i tried to watch Chicago, but i got put off by the middle of the first song, All That Jazz, because Matthias has a habit of performing and dancing to songs from Chicago [we have the avi clips to prove it], and the lovely Catherine Zeta-Jones was continuosly morphing into Matt gyrating. she had a bad haircut in that movie anyway.

watching About A Boy on the 37-inch Sharp Aquos? good.
watching the MTV Video Music Awards on the same 37-inch Sharp Aquos, Christina Aguilera's 'Dirrrty' blown up in the LCD flat-panel's attempt at making her look not-so-thrashy, trampish song over the SRS-enhanced audio feed? not so good.

the same videos, repeated over and over again, were consistently nominated for most of the awards. 50 cent bagged three 'spacemen' for In Da Club.

interestingly, though, The White Stripes' Seven Nation Army was nominated for Best Rock Video. unsurprisingly/expectedly, it lost out to Linkin Park's Somewhere I Belong, which mostly consisted of much CGI and a bed in flames.

for this, they pre-empt VH1? plus, i missed what looked like the opening, with Britney Spears and Chirstina Aguilera camping it up in thrashy bridal gowns, covering Madonna's Like A Virgin, Madonna herself popping up after the 'duet', singing a remixed Hollywood.

why is this interesting to me? the Hollywood remix sounded good, and the whole scene confirmed that BS and CA really hate each others' guts. this is the, what, fifth time they've done a duet? it's like the Mariah Carey/Whitney Houston When You Believe scenario, except MC and WH had the prudence to make it a one night stand. plus, CA is doing a tour with BS's ex, Justin Timberlake [which Avril Lavinge mispronouced, on purpose i hope, as Justin Timberlass].

the silver lining of this dark cloud: there isn't one.

isn't this where i show a distasteful disregard for cliché and sign off with "good-bye, [cruel?] world"?

haha.

"Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance
Silver moon's sparkling
So kiss me"

- "Kiss Me", Sixpence None The Richer

Part Number P10293U - Palm™ Tungsten™ T Stylus 3-Pack - S$27.84

i've lost another stylus. my appetite for these shiny metal sticks is costing me an orange Yusof Ishak each time i lose one. it's the second one since i got my TT in march.

Khooky's fun when drugged. he just sits there, smiling to himself and looking dazed, like Matt on a good day. apparently he wasn't feeling well, and five seconds into his class i knew he was drugged. allergic reaction to Teachers' Day?

i will be scrounging around for my stylus if anyone needs me. [unlikely, that]

"Burn down all your idols
Destroy your idols
Create a scene
There goes all your reason
It's helter skelter
It's not a dream

Come down from the altar
Remove your blindfold
What do you see
Nothing left to do here
There's nothing new here
It's all the same

You're going down, down, down
How low can you go?
You're going down, down, down
How low can you go?
You're going down, down, down
How low can you go?"

- "Subhuman", Garbage

Blue-Gray Billabong Wallet

i'm back on the tracks again. they had my wallet! it took some doing, because i couldn't properly describe 'Blue-Gray Billabong Wallet' in Cheenese, and the staff at the interchange, predictably, didn't understand much English. the person in charge of the interchange was very kind, though, and he told me i was very lucky.

why am i very lucky and not just 'lucky'? because Service 105 passes through Orchard Boulevard between Toa Payoh and Jurong East. why, i do  not know, but imagine this scenario:  Heeren Shops/Orchard Cineplex/Linkin Park/Metallica/Stussy/77th Street poseur boards Service 105 at Orchard Boulevard. finds a Blue-Gray Billabong Wallet with $103 in it. the rest, including my wallet, is history.

thank you, whichever bus captain returned my wallet. i thought i'd lost it forever, but what you did made my day.

"Music stations always play the same songs
I'm bored with the concept of right and wrong

Everybody comes to Hollywood
They wanna make it in the neighbourhood
They like the smell of it in Hollywood
How could it hurt you when it looks so good?"

- "Hollywood", Madonna

Did You Know...

...that it takes SBS Transit Service 105 one-and-a-half hours to get to Jurong East Interchange from Toa Payoh?

where do i find the time to sit down in front of my PC and wax lyrical about SBS Transit's inefficency, you ask?

that's because i'm not. i'm, right now, at 09:48pm, hurtling towards Raffles Place Interchange in a metal cylinder, underground, to Transfer To A East-Bound Train heading for Jurong East, where my wallet is currently being held, writing this entry on my Tungsten T.

why? because i dropped my wallet on the bus while going to tuition.

losing your wallet is hell. see, if i lose my Ericsson, i can just buy another. my contacts are backedup on my Palm. if i lose my Palm, i can just buy another. my data is backed up on my PC. but if i lose my wallet, my cash, my Student Identification Pass, my IC, my Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf drink card with 10 stamps, my library receipts, they're not backed up anywhere. you can't HotSync your cash and IC back into your new Billabong/Braun Buffel/etc wallet. you can't resend your SIP via a Bluetooth connection.

hence, i'm losing two hours' sleep, spending the time heading to Jurong East to get my wallet tonight, mainly because it will be handed over the police after 24 hours of receipt, as my wallet contains a sizable chunk of change.

"You're going down, down, down
How low can you go?
You're going down, down, down
How low can you go?
You're going down, down, down
How low can you go?"

- "Subhuman", Garbage

hare hare krishna

i've finally manged to get Subhuman by Garbage. the song's rare because there were only 5000 copies of the 'single' [it's not a bona-fide single, because Subhuman isn't on any of their albums] made. thank you, MPEG Layer 3. Subhuman is every bit the lyrics promised. plus i now share Joycelyn Yik's view that Garbage's b-sides, unlike most other groups, are equally good if not better than their singles.

i've spent the day turning down invites, including my mom's for lunch. she's now at some pub, drinking beer and watching the EPL. somehow i feel my mom would have a much better time in my place, as a secondary school boy. i've sorted out too many Blaster, Welchia and Sobig viruses problems, some of them other peoples' problems, and done too little in other departments.

Full Frontal is an excellent movie. The Guru is hilarious. Chicken Rice War is the best homegrown movie made, knocking Forever Fever to second. Home Run is a ridiculous, heart-wrenching waste of time. i want to go watch Down With Love and Freaky Friday, but who with?

physics preliminary practical examination tomorrow, and no calcuator. i've never wanted any Casio this much, if ever at all. however, in the process of wanting one, i've learned that Jonathan Dax and Hongxuan need one as well, but not for tomorrow like i do. how this helps is unclear, but it's interesting all the same.

does my future bank on Casio? wish me luck.

"Hare Hare Krishna
Was that your sister
A cover girl
A wasted prima donna
She lost her way here
She disappeared

Come back to your altar
And build a fire
It's getting cold
Nothing stops you in here
There's not a soul here
You're all alone

You're going down, down, down
How low can you go?
You're going down, down, down
How low can you go?
You're going down, down, down
How low can you go?"

- "Subhuman", Garbage

never send a substitute to do your job

i got a C6 for my Cheenese O Level Exam, with a Merit in the oral component. exactly the same as I managed last year. i not ecstatic, but it's more than i can say for some people. since the HOD was away on a trip to Cheena, the subject head took over. he gleaned zero respect from the students as he attempted to reprimand them, and i almost felt sorry for the bugger. almost.

i'm retaking the exam. no point in not retaking, and having that much free time in the library would possibly make me rip my brains out. don't get me wrong, i appreciate the free time, but too much sitting there, listening to inane conversation from those not retaking and other assorted allsorts [it's like they're trying Really Hard to convince me that they're all female poseurs], re-reading what i've read, etc. plus the lower secondary runts are noisy, and all they do is get in your way. i once had to literally drag five runts out of my way when going up the staircase for Khooky's class.

however, i now realize that retaking the exam costs more then the $17 [or so i'm told] that i have to pay as exam fees. a part of my sanity goes along with that seventeen bucks, as i sit in Cheenese class, doing unhelpful compos, unhelpful workbook excersises and unhelpful lessons, remediation or otherwise. they forced us to stay back for remedial classes last term. did it help? why would it now?

i'm beginning to get home later and later these days, be it for school or tuition or other crap like dropping off my Sony/Palm/Ericsson for service, and in the interests of sleep, i rarely do anything else when i get back to my house in the dark weekday night, except for eating and showering. how un-depressing.

in other news, more people than i originally thought block me on their MSN Messenger Contact Lists. hmm. so much for All Things Remaining Constant.

"If we sleep together
Will you like me better
If we come together
We'll go down forever
If we sleep together
Will I like you better
If we come together
Prove it now or never

Make me a pretty person
Make me feel like I belong
Make me hard and make me happy
Make me beautiful

The emptiness
The craziness
Satisfy this hungriness
Darling
How would it feel?"

- "Sleep Together", Garbage

"Attention students: the school is now officially on fire. Please begin your Emergency Evacuation Procedure now. Repeat: the school is now..."

[Blogger has a character limit on post titles. the original title read as follows:

"Attention students: the school is now officially on fire. Please begin your Emergency Evacuation Procedure now. Repeat: the school  is now officially on fire. Please evacuate. Thank you."]

Received : Friday, 15th August 2003 06:33 am
From  : omanager@slss.edumin.co.sg
To  : allstaff@slss.edumin.co.sg
Re  : Today's Emergency Exercise

Hi all

As you are all doubtlessly aware by now, there will today be an Emergency Exercise at 11:30 am, sharp. Teachers, I understand that you have a tight schedule to run [especially with SARS affecting us this year], but please allow the students to leave the classroom when the announcement is made. Please make sure, though, that the students evacuate only after the verbal announcement and not immediately after the emergency siren.

Most of you have been briefed about this exercise already, but in case you weren't at the meeting yesterday evening, I mentioned that I have had some equerries from teachers on gate duty at the carpark, regarding their exact duties. For you teachers, your duty is simply to shut and man the gates during the exercise. This way, we will be able to block vehicular access to the school and prevent students from escaping, all while the school is 'on fire'. I'm particulary proud of this last stroke of genius by the committee. It is really an effective way of ensuring that the exercise runs efficiently, without un-expected interruptions.

The AV Club has been instructed to prepare a sound system for use in the carpark. I have requested for a larger, louder system, but Miss Kali informs me that this is un-feasable. The I/C will have to make do with whatever it is she comes up with, as the Club's students will be involved in the exercise.

That being all, let's make this a great Emergency Exercise. Remember, in this day and age of un-determinable terrorist attacks and SARS, Drills Save Lives.

--- End Of Message ---

- "Shut Your Mouth", Garbage

the Samsung office

this is the first time i've been near a in PC in 24 hours, and the Internet just got a whole lot emptier.

but first, a sideline [and this's well worth the distraction, too. it's an Aaron Has A Heart moment]. celebrations for my mother's birthday [today] begun [like with Christmas] twelve days ago, with the pubbing and the clubbing and the dining. i'm just thankful that she didn't drag me along. today, i got white lilies delivered for her. they're her favorite flowers, and she loved them. [apparently she got married with white lilies as well - i should know, i was there] i think that one moment when she got them was worth the week-and-a-half's allowance i spent on the flowers.

i had to spend $9.10 on a cab ride to school this morning to avoid tardiness. but to sweeten the ordeal of the morning, i got called in to the P's office, together with Matt and Dax. it was diffcult for the left side of my brain not to point out that there was this [zen/meditation? not for me, but one man's meat...] device spurting out random jungle sounds [much akin to one of the polyphonic ringing tones on the Samsung A800] in his office. the left side was trying hard not to burst out laughing, especially since he kept pausing for the monkey to stop screeching. the right side of my brain took over and responded in those even tones i tend to use when i get really... emotional?

naw. that's not the right word. one doesn't speak in even tones when one is emotional or passionate about something, does one? maybe that says something about what i'm emotional/passionate about [nothing?]. to sum up, here's a lesson in Cause & Effect:

Cause 1 - the P doesn't like the photo of Pat And His Fingers on the homepage of Dax's blog, because he was being vulgar in the Victoria School Uniform. [which i find understandable, believe it or not]
Effect 1 - Free Open Diary screwed up and he can't remove the photo, so he's locked his blog.

Cause 2 - the material on Matt's blog is found to be objectional, for obvious reasons
Effect 2 - all that remains on Matt's blog is one solitary full-stop

Cause 3 - i walked along the seventh-floor linkway.
Effect 3 - Ms Ernie stopped me and quipped that she could get my Billabong duffel bag for seven dollars in Thailand. first person to make me smile all week.

one thing he said really took the piss, though. Ang questioned my comment on Mr Tan and Mr Lai two entries ago. asked if i was, by my comparison, an extremely macho man/person. i told him i couldn't define myself, which was true. but it doesn't take a genius to know that i definitely do not consider myself prime, grade A, alpha-male. i, who hates PE? i, who hates soccer? i, who hates mindless physical exertion [aka "insert sport here"]?

you'd have to know very little about me to think that.

"I never claimed to be your savior
I said I had a dirty mouth
I've got to keep myself together
You know I hate to disappoint
A masochistic lamb to slaughter
Maybe you missed the point

I'm feeling small
I'm climbing the walls
I don't let it show

Now that you know what you know
I bet you wish that it'd go
You'll never come sucking your thumb
Better off dumb

Maybe I could write a letter
To help me with my self-esteem
You should get to know me better
No one's ever what they seem

I'm feeling small
Climbing the walls
I don't let it show

Now that you know what you know
I bet you wish that it'd go
You'll never come sucking your thumb
Better off dumb"

- "Dumb", Garbage

whatafish

to the four i had lunch with yesterday: if you thought i was, i wasn't kidding about the anti-depressants.

"When I saw the break of day
I wished that I could fly away
Instead of kneeling in the sand
Catching teardrops in my hand"

- "Don't Know Why", Norah Jones

Movie by CLIE

hah. if it's honest responses they want, it's honest responses they'll get. i got called down for the NE Quiz for the third time in five years. it was being run by three female teachers, two complete fairies, and one disgraced fish-cage contractor. i did not accept Mr Tan's explanation that it was a random selection. I Think I'm Paranoid.

i missed the Black Stripes concert [a cleverly-disguised mock UN conference in drag] because:
- i didn't know the when and where
- my mobile line was cut [my father ran up $700+ of charges, and my mom would only pay it with his money]
- my sister was hogging the phone, and i wasn't going to bitch with her to talk to Matthias
- Dax couldn't lend me his Ixus, anyway.

a shot of Hongxuan in his costume, together with an explaination as to why he was/is gay, made me wish i had bothered. i cannot even begin to imagine what Matthias wore, and what he was doing in liason with a cow. plus the fashion/strip show sounded interesting, as per the picture Matthias painted for my benefit.

also, Streats is quickly becoming Singapore's Hello!/The Sun. [Of Monks and Mercs?]

"Victoria principal faces parents' ire - School head Ang Pow Chew defends $200,000 eco-garden, justifies high costs"
- Streats, Front Page, Thursday, July 10, 2003

we got blasted by Mr Ang for that. goodness know what it had to do with us, except to provide entertainment. plus, today's Streats published a comment by Lee Han Shi, which makes direct, personal digs at Mr Ang. this is how you sell papers. this is how you get my attention. not with some twins' death, or some device that converts piss and shit into water.

Khooky seems to be having fun with having his own classroom. besides the "Land Mines Are Not Toys" posters [i'm all for people not killing themsleves with discarded lands mines and cluster bombs, but do they really need huge posters that look to me to be saying "NO" in whatever language they're in? aren't they a bit patronizing? wait, hold that thought. yeah, the posters fit Khooky very well.], there are now Mao-era posters no doubt framed with 50x70cm IKEA RAKET frames, and

- "Hollywood", Madonna

snotty, shitty, five-year-old

i am in the fucking-thirteenth-level-of-taoist-hell. my sister is having a birthday party, and this boy, one of the snotty, shitty, five-year-old classmates of hers, has a SonyEricsson P800.

fucking bastard. and what the hell is he doing with the Symbian UI OS? drawing happy fun scrawlings on his equally-snotty-shitty-five-year-old-friends' photographs, taken with the built-in VGA-resolution digital camera.

i will likely report on the better half of my day [including Ms Ernie's wedding], when i have backed down from:

A - the emergency vasectomy session
B - the mirgrane caused by ten screaming kids whom i would LOVE to murder
C - the window-ledge of my thriteenth-floor Chuan Park Type A Luxurious Condominium [Special Offer - one month only - 17 parking lots ONLY $1]

"I came to cut you up
I came to knock you down
I came around to tear your little world apart
I came to shut you up
I came to suck you down
I came around to tear your little world apart
Tear your little world apart
Tear your little world apart
And break your soul apart"

- "Vow", Garbage

shut up, you annoying little poseur, Part II

i had to go out into the world and help people today. yech. i had to schelp into poor people's territory, where schools like Bedok View Secondary were a literal stone's throw away. it was funny watching the poor. some didn't even have doorbells on their doors. i gave up the idea of asking people for donations and just carried stuff, lest i break out into delirious laughter at the so wonderfully retro time machine we've unconvered in Bedok South Avenue 3. i even managed to get a glimsp of intra-family backstabbing. see, Bedok View Secondary School was scheduled to do exactly the same thing [collect old newspapers, clothes, etc] four days from today. their operation, apparently, is approved by the police and their town council. i was sniggering away after i read they notice posted at the first lift lobby we were at. my group shamelessly solicited donations from a flat which we all saw a Bedok View Seocndary student walk into. the poor bugger looked on helplessly as his father gave away the donations of canned food, old clothes and newpapers. he even had the letter we spammed their mailboxes with. i had to laugh and laugh and laugh.

there was a PAP Community Federation right next to the blocks our class was doing. this, combined with the MOTOMORPH bus that we got onto to get there, was prime teaser material against Matt. however i made no more than a few lame attempts. wasn't really in the mood, and it wasn't helped by the anti-drug and pro-family crap they tried to push onto me at school. yech. maybe i should start the anti-depressants like my doctor recommended after all.

later, when a groups of us marched towards civilization, we were accosted in the Tanah Merah MRT toliet. this American kid pulled something i assume to be straight out of Jackass: The Movie. thankfully, i had watched clips on MTV, and went along with it.

Nick thought i knew him.

Alvin thought he was insane.

if there's one thing i've learnt from my tuition teacher, it's to avoid provoking the insane. hmm. i think i should work for Mammon Inc.

- "The Rafters", Moby

shut up, you annoying little poseur.

it's cute when stupid people are angry.

look at Matt's blog, that letter from Linkin Park Land

then, tell me: is this the kind of student we are trying to bring into the real world?

sends letters to oneself, speaks the ubiquitous mother tongue of the sk8ter bois, and is the prefect Victorian. that means he's been blindly conned into the idealism of being a gentlemen, professional and sportsman. sheep. baa-bloody-baa. does he use a Nokia too? i assume the typical 8250. 8310? 6510? [nah, too tasteful, even for a Nokia]. he's the exact type of human being that my father depends on to make his huge profit on his illegal gambling business in Paupa New Guinea [incidentally, neither of my parents are grateful to the government. my father evident isn't/cannot be, and my mom always votes opposition at the GEs, and railed endlessly at the PAP as they drove past in their lorry in the recent one, because the consituency we were in at the time experienced a walkover. she also hollered at me when i brought up a PAP poster/banner thing, which i did for a lark]

one thing: how many Brians could Matt possibly have?

i think i'll print the letter out, annotate it in red marker, and then scan it back in on my CanoScan [oh! i have my scanner set up! how about that?], after which it goes onto the internet. i'm not giving up such a good oppotunity to laugh at the stupid and lift my spirits.

hey, wait, i'd love some hate mail too: garbage@singnet.com.sg don't bother with the porn and spam. i get enough of it, what with my dictionary-word userID.

postscript: after a harrowing conversation, i decieded to remove this entry. however, 5 seconds later, after re-reading it, i changed my mind. Matt, what do you expect of me? NiceAaron? of course you get AaronTechBitch. so does everyone else.

"I know how to hurt
I know how to heal
I know what to show
And what to conceal

I know when to talk
And I know when to touch
No one ever died from wanting too much

The world is not enough
But it is such a perfect place to start, my love
And if you're strong enough
Together we can take the world apart, my love"

- "The World Is Not Enough", Garbage

good evening, mr president.

The Victoria Challenge.

a huge grammatical error that's so attended to and ignored, all at the same time.

it started yesterday, the day after our Resiliency Training, where much sex was talked ["watching porn together is good for you"], and i was taught that nothing is my fault. whilst i was briefing the cameramen and registering their cameras, cell phone numbers and routes, it came to light that one of the groups didn't have a camera. i was going to explode, but i went to see if the AV could lend us one of theirs. i called Miss Ernie, but she needed help, so i ran over and asked later.

turns out the School Hall's Epson projector's control panel was jammed from over-manupilation [or at least i think so. i didn't take the time to diagnose] i had to use the remote control and switch the input mode from the stage. which gave me an excellent oppurtunity to break in/show off my new Ericsson HBH-10 Bluetooth Headset. all while Mr Maran instructed the students on silent behaviour, mere seconds before the Guest Of Honour was due to arrive. A very hairy situation. exactly the kind i handle well.

Mrs DeSouza complimented me when i ran into her later, while i was walking about, saying that i was about the only one who knew what they were doing. while one might not be able to dispute that, i do not expect Miss Ernie to be familiar with the new equipment, what with the teaching, planing, and other things she has on her mind. however, AnnaTechBitch's mind seems to be completely devoid of anythng substantial. what they paying her for? is this how tax money is spent by the government & The MOE? i couldn't borrow a camera from the AV Department because she hadn't unpacked anything yet, but she isn't familiar with the new equipment, either! what has she been doing for the past month?

clearly, AnnaTechBitch wasn't doing her job again. but, then again, what do/can you expect from a transferred office clerk? i expect they were desperate for someone to fill Mrs Tan's position, so they plucked out the first person they saw in the general office. [there was a nice opening for a racist shot right there in that last sentence, but i will not take that shot, because her incompetence is more than enough to poke about, without having to resort to racist remarks]

AnnaTechBitch has wanted to quit since Speech Day 2001. and December 2001. and Speech Day 2002. and December 2002. and pre-move-Marine-Parade-is-too-far-for-me March, April, May & June 2003. yet she is still here, bungling up the AV Department, long after having me "let go" from the department.

Case In Point: she was asked to get a replacement cable for the rostrum condenser microphone [also at the VC Launch] the standard is a female floor port and a male microphone port. so, those still following me would be able to tell that we needed a male-female cable [those of you who think that i'm talking about transsexuals or sex, Jonathan Dax's blog is the one for you. go away] AnnaTechBitch provided a male-male cable. Miss Ernie was mad. but not in front of AnnaTechBitch, with is what puzzled me. why be so [fake] nice to her, instead of telling her to warn of her next

menstruation WAV/AIFF Select an audio format to hear this word.
men·stru·a·tion [ mènstroo áysh'n ] noun

monthly discharge from the womb: the monthly process of discharging blood and other matter from the womb that occurs between puberty and menopause in women and female primates who are not pregnant

"My class' challenge was to give out greeting cards and copies of the school magazine to 127 establishments in the East Coast area, so in this way we're not just doing something that only involves the school, but the community itself, by saying 'hello' to the neighbors in our community"

i gave that speech all night long at the gala event [VS Cremonial Move Guest Of Honor: President S R Nathan Saturday 28th June 2003 05:45pm] The President was warm and easy-going, interested in our challenge, and shook my hand twice. i didn't expect it because i was told not to attempt physical contact, but he offered his hand, and i shook it before anyone could think/see that i was contemplating it. he didn't stick to some standardized hello-what-did-you-do-that's-nice-thank-you-goodbye. he asked me why we didn't stop my his house. i wanted to say that it was because this anti-PAP friend of mine planned the stops, but instead i told him that we were right opposite, at the Eurasian Communty House.

he started to go after thanking me, but almost imperceptively turned back and shook my hand again. Miss Toh and Mr Hazrin later asked me if it was cold or wet. it was neither. it wasn't like i was meeting Enzo Ferrari or Shirley Manson, but how many people got to shake the hand of their own President? twice? i just wish someone took my photo.

after tending to more guests, and as the night slowed down, Benjamin, James, Jerome, Dax, Matt, Pat, and etcetera came over to disturb my booth. Benjamin tried to play the SARS-vivor rap over the speakers, from his Apple iPod. he succeeded on the third try, while i was in the toliet. i grabbed the power outlet and unplugged the speakers. how he got the SARS-vivor rap onto his iPod, i do not want to know.

final word on the Ericsson HBH-10: some said it was ridiculous, Matt said it made me look like a geek, [probably relative to him, one who cannot set up a scanner to save his life] quite a number said it was cool, Edgar Chia's group on the seventh floor thought i was rich, and one of my AV juniors said i would look like a bloody airplane at night.

so there isn't a final word. hmm. i miss the past two days already.

"In a modern culture
My friend you must be careful
They've a million
Ways to kill you
In this dangerous world
There's an art to growing old
Taking chances
Magic happens

One mistake's all it takes
And your life has come undone
Walk away 'cause you're breaking up the girl
It's a drag
I know it's hard
But you're tearing her apart
Walk away 'cause you're breaking up the girl"

- "Breaking Up The Girl", Garbage

the white stripes, and Siglap Link

i read the paper yesterday, as i always try to, so that i can keep up with the latest developments in propaganda, when, lo and behold, at 02:45pm, [i had been awake for only fifteen minutes]? i found the Next Phase Of The Victoria School PR Plan!

Solar Panels! EcoPond! Biodegradable rice-husk-and-bamboo KarmicWare! "A school in the garden!" "I heard we can even have PE lessons at East Coast Park!" A Hyundai Tuscani two-door coupe [i refuse to call it a sports car] in the Principal's parking lot! [oops. how did that ever get in there?]

Victoria School Goes Green - New Siglap premises to have biodegradable plates, solar power, green projects - PAGE H9

raise your hands, those who are sickened. i wonder how PR will help us, acadamically.

today, i awoke at 9am, because StarHub Telescope touted MTV's Five Night Stand featuring Garbage at 11am, and i wanted to record it. i forgot my rule to Always Go To The Source, and blindly trusted it. i ended up recording some crap music videos on Non-Stop Hits [on my head]. the MTV Asia website stated calmly that Five Night Stand was due on the 28th at 12 noon, even as i railed at it endlessly for not informing me.

while in my mom's cheerfuly red Suzuki Swift GL, i was listening to New This Week, this crappy segement on P10 where "Dan The Man" goes all demented and introduces the tracks that've been served up on a platter to them, for them to murder. Seven Nation Army by The White Stripes was on the list. the short clip demonstrated that Seven Nation Army was thrashy, but then i remembered that Matt listens to The White Stripes. you can imagine his reaction when i told him, can't you?

it was a surprise to him because he doesn't listen to the radio [except the BBC World Service, not unlike Mrs Raj], and rightly so too. to answer "Why do You listen to the radio, then?", here's a list of all the radio stations that ever feature on my mom's Kenwood car stereo:

91.3 Mhz WKRZ 91.3 [for the techno]
95.0 Mhz Class 95 FM
98.7 Mhz Perfect 10
98.0 Mhz Power 98
93.8 Mhz NewsRadio 93.8 [strictly for traffic info only]

"Shut the damn thing off" is never an option, which is why i splurged on my Palm Tungsten|T, so i have music i can put into my pocket, as opposed to bringing an entire haversack because a smaller bag looks silly [those sling-type Discman-sized ones i used to carry around until i realized it was a male equivalent to a purse. you might argue that the haversack is one, or the shoebag is another, but i don't carry a shoebag because of that, and the haversack was my last option]

"I won't take you as you are
Please don't take me as i am
Find your lonely life bizzare
You'll see this in love
You'll see this in life"

- "Above You, Below Me", Badly Drawn Boy

fan nokian

i kinda promised myself that there would be no more confusing splash pages for my blog, but that was too good to pass up. if you look closely, [i work in 1280x1024 hence i had to dumb it down, for those not using 17" Flat Panel LCD monitors, on the splash page] you'll see it's apparently Matthias Yao's blog, proudly brought to you by aklwIncorporated.

when i turned on the TV after i got home at 10:21am this morning, i saw, in this order, while channel surfing:

-> credits for The Price Is Right
-> some Cheena kid's programme trying to teach physics [i'm not kidding]
-> an Avril Lavinge video
-> another-

i shut the damn thing off.

"Come see what we all talk about
People moving to the moon
Stop baby don't go stop here
Never stop living here
Till it eats the heart from your soul
Keeps down the sound of your
Silent sigh"

- "Silent Sigh", Badly Drawn Boy

Ow-Cowabunga!

i really wanted to go in-depth with my account of The Days Between Last Friday And Today, but too much has happened, and something that really took the piss out of me cropped up today, so it's a quick run-through before i move onto today.

Saturday the 17th
-> my mom bought the About A Boy VCD for me. i've watched it four times since. it's That good. and i re-read the book, also for the fourth time

Sunday the 18th
-> birthday of one of my mom's friends. went to Costa Sands Resort, where they wouldn't let us in at a gate closer to our chalet because they wanted to screen everyone for SARS
-> my mom and my aunt [birds of a feather] called up the management and told them [in so many words] that their system was screwed up, as they didn't take our temperature at the door or when we collected the keys, hence if anyone in out party had SARS, so would the Costa Sands Resort staff by now
-> CSR staff persist in making us lug three carfuls of stuff through the front gate, the full length of the resort away from our chalet
-> by three carfuls, i mean one Toyota Ipsum [MPV used as a hatchback], one Honda Stream [MPV used as a hatchback] and one Suzuki Swift [hatchback used as an MPV]. guess which one belongs to my family? only the Cheenas would lug a mahjong table and stand fan everywhere they go
-> we went through the front gate, having no choice as all the side gates were locked, snubbing all those asking us for our SARS declaration forms. we also breezed thorugh the temp-checking station, because no-one bothered to stop us
-> i had a crap time, after shifting the stuff around i spent the day in the upstairs air-con room, watching TV, reading About A Boy and having four Cokes, one Tonic Water and three packets of crisps until it was time to go home
-> however we didn't leave until three hours after the pre-set time, and i found myself wandering in the painfully hip 'restored' 'old-town' area of East Coast Park. if i had my wallet i'd be in The Coffee Bean, but i didn't and my sis' boyfriend very kindly paid for refreshments
-> oh, and me and my aunt stopped to admire the New Victoria School on the way to CSR. it looked fantastic, and i wondered why she'd never noticed it. she actually did, but never believed anyone [except me] who told her it was a school

Monday the 19th
-> Cheena Paper One. 'nuff said.

Tuesday the 20th
-> English Paper One and EHistory
-> crapped up my SBQ becuase i was distracted by the sudden change in question 1c, where 'more' was changed into 'less'
-> i was doing the sections backwards and was already on 1b, i panicked, hastily reworded my answer, five minutes later i realized that all i had to do was change all my 'more's into 'less's, but it was too late
-> was extremely distracted after that, and chose the wrong SEQ to do - World War One impact
-> didn't realize i had nothing to say until i was into my first paragraph of 3a, with ten minutes left on the paper
-> also realized i had Much more to say about The Pacific War, question 2a and b, as it had been harped to death after we went all Cumulative on our Pacific War CA1
-> i gave up on the paper.

Today
-> i clearly did not sleep enough, because i went all snarky on my CME MidYear and will probably get a 0 for it, unless whoever marks it has a sense of humour, is not pregnant/married/has kids/dating/engaged/elderly, or less they'll be seriously offended. but i don't think having a sense of humour will help me much, as no marks can be awarded for my snarkiness. well, at least no one can accuse me of not being honest. plus, in all my years of experience with the OMM [Optical Marking Machine] in the AVMediaResouce [spanking new name, eh?], it's never laughed at any of my jokes, hence i really don't think it'll appreciate my answers
-> my lack of sleep was also noticable because it took ALL of my energy to concentrate on my Cheena Listening Comprehension, and my Geography Paper also horrendously suffered, as it took even more of an age to recall anything, and i, as usual, only managed to complete 3 out of 4 questions. this's what happens when you devote more time to your books and less to sleep. hmmph.
-> had to schlepp down to Olympus Studio at High Street Center on Hill Street to collect my broken C-2020 Zoom. i decided it wasn't worth the $200 to fix a camera that only speaks Japanese, so i will be shameless bothering my father for a C-750 UltraZoom when he comes back. it costs over a thousand, which is where i drawn the line for spending my own money for my own things
-> i took the bus in the wrong direction there, ended up in Eunos. i also took the bus in the wrong direction a few more time after that:

School > 61 > Eunos Interchange > MRT > City Hall > Funan Center Coffee Bean > Olympus Studio > 61 > HaborFront Center > 143 > Trellis Towers > 105 > Chuan Park

it could have been:

School > 61 > Olympus Studio > 61 > School > 107 > Serangoon Interchange > 105 > Chuan Park

I Need A Car! And A Driving Licence!

finally, what really took the piss out of me. these past few days, there have been one or two letters written into newspapers asking for the MOE to relax the education regime in Singapore. what interested me was the one in Today about Mother Tongue, and how it really wasn't a Mother Tongue, as most people find it as alien as Yiddish, and how a pass should be mandatory but not hellish to obtain, and how no-one's going to notice, anyway

i was all for it, and happy that people were [once again] taking notice of the failure of our mothers' tongues, until this Duman High Bitch wrote into ST to say the the Cheenese were having it much worse in Cheena, and how her life is all 'work' but she thinks it's all good, so that our future leaders can compete with Cheena's future leaders, basically going on about shit that the Ministry and the Government wants to hear, but no-one needed going on about.

who does she think she is?!

she is either a govermental spy meant to brainwash us all into being good Confucians, a brown-noser trying to get into the [young] PAP, seriously delusional, a spy for the Cheena government trying to bring about the downfall of Singapore by turning us all into slavedriven muggers, or is having her period.

if any of you out there happen to see Rebecca Lim Sin Mei [Ms] on the streets, would you be so kind as to hack her to death for me?

- "S.P.A.T.", Badly Drawn Boy

we love SARS

KarmicWare thermometers were given on wednesday
-> cheapo looking [read; Made In Cheena]
-> also called Becton Dickinson Europe 521807
-> proudly proclaims MADE IN CHINA [sic] ?on the back
-> ?Becton Dickinson Europe must be damn proud that they took advantage of stupidpeople
-> said people are stupid enough to manufacture poor-quality devices at dirt-cheap prices
->called KarmicWare thermometers because they bear more than a passing resemblance to the recyclable, biodegradable, save-the-fucking-world crap they're using in place of actual cutlery
-> these thermometers will used to conduct VS's largest PR project so far? [the KarmicWare job was a flop]
-> our dear Doraemon will grace the event by embrassing the school with his three-act dramedy play, entitled How To Take Your Oral Temperature
-> thank goodness i don't have to be in school today.

went out with more 1987-ers after that
-> pat wouldn't stop his drop-thermometer-on-floor-and-put-it-back-in-his-mouth-immediately routine?
-> the lot wouldn't stop making obsence remarks in the b??ack of the bus
-> the foodcourt at Le Merdien was zapped out of Golden Mile Complex. all Thai.
-> matt dragged us all to Books Kinokuniya to look for a book he later decided to order from Amazon.com because the one they had on sale was to expensive [what's that? i hear a little bird chirping! and it's going: Cheap! Cheap! Cheap!]
-> after giving up on the Age Of Reason by Thomas whatshisname, he procceded to look for a photography book
-> this is disturbing because it wasn't "Photography For Dummies - A Reference For The Rest Of Us!", and as we all know, he can't work anything more complicated than his Nokia 8210, Jonathan's Canon Ixus, my defucnt Olympus C-2020 Zoom, and his Packard Bell PC, so what is he doing looking for a professional photography book? ??
-> the afternoon wasn't a complete bust, though. i'll have to admit that watching matt try to work the KinoHelper was hilarous, which goes to show that matt simply cannot work anything that runs on AC current, let alone a touch-screen terminal with non-QWERTY on-screen keyboard

had a party later in the night
-> had a great time. saw people i haven't seen in ages, and set me up nicely for my long weekend

"I hear you say it
Play it smart girl
Win the game love
Give’em what they want
What they want to see and you could be a big star
You could go far
Make a landmark
What have you been reading you smart girl?
Win the game love
Give’em what they want
What they want to see and you could be a big star
You could go far
Make a landmark
Make a shitload"

- "Shut Your Mouth", Garbage

somebody get me out of here, i'm tearing up myself

the sad state i'm in can be defined by the fact that i've promised myself that my webpage should be up by now. and though it is, it isn't in it's full glory.

why's that, you ask?

well, here's a sampling of Shit That's Happended To Me Since My Last Entry:

- i had to ship my PC to Papua New Guinea [no, MSN addicts, i wasn't kidding. and i built the damn thing myself.]
- i ended up buying a Dell to replace the PC now used for illegal stuff [becuase i'm rich and lazy]
- i had to transfer my data over to my new PC without destroying it [not a success. i accidentally reformatted it, and some, meaning most, of the files are gone forever]
- i''ve dropped my Palm Tungsten | T. Twice.
- my brother got a Nokia 7250, and my mother subsequently got a 6100
- the new Ericsson T610 is Nokian!!! [more on that later]
- MidYears are here, and i'm not sure if i'm ready.
- people are still calling each other x-Kiat [eg. Peng-Kiat [Matthias Chew] Boon-Kiat [Benjamin Keng] Sng-Kiat [James Sng]
- people are still calling me Khoo-Kiat, which i do not respond to
- i'm trying to organize a class gathering, but the class is uncooperative. no RSVPs? people assume that we have a food synthesizer that'll serve any number of people, surprise guests or otherwise?

matt apparently had his birthday on the 11th. i had no idea i was actually sending him messages about his birthday [or so it seemed]. i was just having a really crap mothers' day dinner at Swensen's, and needed a snarkish break.

to add to that, i spent monday after-exam with matt and this kenneth guy. he had to go to his place near one of my old houses, at Jalan Besar. as is expected, they ended up having a great time with Monopoly on my Palm, while i sat there trying not to encourage the crazy loon [no, really, he was insane] sitting near us to continue being excessively vocal [i do not mean matt, at least not this time]

and then hongxuan, jondax and patrick went over to thrash matt's house some time after we three split ways. busy day for matt.

i'll end with three questions [hey, like i did for my cheena compo! or was that two?]

1 - why did matt open the door?
2 - should i even ask why there exists a photo of matt gyrating in front of Tweety Bird?
3 - why, Ericsson, why?!

oh, and i need photos, people. don't tell me you went all the way to Tampines to wreck matt's house and didn't bring a camera.

"somebody get me out of here, i'm tearing up myself
nobody gives a damn about me, or anybody else"

- "Medication", Garbage

The Cheap, DECT, Panasonic, Phone

so my mum's screaming at me about the new cordless phone. she can't seem to grasp any new technology more complicated than her Nokia 8850 [which brings up the interesting point of how she's going to cope with the 7250, but that's another story] IT'S NOT MY FAULT YOU WANTED TO BUY A CHEAP DECT PHONE. i told her the Phillips one was of better quality and much easier to use. she chose to save the money and go for the Panasonic one which came with two handsets. i don't see how any of that's my fault.

- "Stupid Girl", Garbage

7250 + 8850 + S57 + 8910 + iPaq + T|T - T68m

the morning started with a wondrous symphony of my parents' voices. in A#. they were arguing about money again, my father having spent his half of the $10 000 he brought back from PNG at the horse races. my mom spent most of her half on the house mortgage and a replacement bed. which my father ordered and was supposed to pay for. when my mom asked him to transfer more money here, he said he couldn't/wouldn't/shouldn't. but within 12 hours of losing that $5 000, he immediately transfers more over.

he wanted to go visit his father this morning. my aunt, who lives with my granddad, wanted me to help her install her HP LaserJet 5L. i didn't think it was a good idea, what with the war going on and all. [hint: NOT gulf war 2] besides, the drivers were generic and hence the same as the old ones'.

thankfully, StarHub Center did not have to suffer the embarrassment of my father today, us having separated from him when he decided to head to my aunt's on his own. my mom dropped me off to queue first, but there were only three people in the queue, who disappeared the moment i got near. kudos to StarHub. however, i still ended up in one of the most unpleasant situations this year. queue for a fashion-victim Nokia. at a half-price promotion.

the grey one looked less offensive, hence i got my mom to buy it. we had lunch at Sushi Ondo, a budget spin-off of Genki Sushi, where all but three plates of sushi are $1.50 each. the rest of the day involved me being dragged in and out of bra sections, sitting for ages in the Giodanos of Centrepoint, and turning down a Coffee Bean Ice Blended on account of a queasy stomach.

"I bit my tongue and stood in line
With not much to believe in
I bought into what I was sold
And ended up with nothing

This is not my idea of a good time
This is not my idea of a good time
This is not my idea of a good time
This is not my idea"

- "Not My Idea", Garbage

severe whatever whatever syndrome

things can get really crappy when everything grinds to a halt. some parents panic, and all schools shut down. i'm thankful for the extra sleep and non-homework time allotted to me, but i could do without the ignorance of adults. including my parents'.

my useless father's back in singapore [since thursday], btw. back to terrorize the population and talk about 'typical singaporeans' when he is so clearly one of them. Nokia 8910 Midnight Edition, remember?

it being I-Haven't-Been-To-Pay-My-Repsects-All-Year-So-I-Might-As-Well-Do-It-Now Day, [Qing Ming Jie] the six of us squeezed into the Suzuki Swift GL and made our way to Lim Chu Kang. an entire hour late.

see, we were supposed to arrive at 0700-0730. i woke at 0600. i was ready by 0630. the rest of the family [aka the females, plus my father, surprisingly] was ready by 0715. my brother had time for a nap before we left.

we spent two hours or so entertaining the relatives, fake smiles, witch-like laughter [male:female ratio was at least 2:1], and my father embarrassing all of us, acting like the ringmaster of an absurd circus. my first aunt had the guts to lash out at him, subtly, which i've always admired. however, he either did not understand it, or was to involved in talking about himself to pay attention.

later that evening, we had half the [very long] queue at StarHub Center staring at us as my father wondered out[very]loud if the phones were being given away for free.

my mom was taking advantage of an offer for half-price Nokia 7250s. this is one of few instances when i would advocate the purchase of a Nokia. half-price. it must be really too ugly, then, even for the singaporean [buy... Nokia... cool...] population.

the thing is not only ugly, but has a crappy camera and keeps in with the Nokia tradition of monomedia MMS. which, incidentally, means not being able to send/forward sounds in your multimedia messages. i told her to buy the gray one, far, far less offensive than the "Plum" cover.

going back to my father, he exclaimed that he would not wait the estimated two hours for the phone, and would rather fork out the extra $500 than have dinner another minute later. i was trying very hard not to bonk him on the head.

my father being back means that my SIM is in his ridiculous Nokia, which WOULD NOT PAIR WITH MY PALM TUNGSTEN|T, EVEN AFTER I THREATENED THE DAMN THING WITH A THIRTEEN STOREY FALL. pairing, btw, means to set up two Bluetooth devices to 'trust' each other and accept connections without prior authorization. so why does it not surprise me when the Nokia asks for permission EACH BLOODY TIME I TRY TO DOWNLOAD MY MESSAGES?! i had to find the fucking buried setting and turn it off.

his shopping list this time is roughly $15 000 long. this includes [but is not limited to]:

a plasma TV

a $1 000 Mont Blanc pen, sorry, penmanship instrument [he lost his $300 one on the plane]

a new set of living room furniture

a laundry dryer [condos do not provide bamboo-pole-perching facilities. isn't that wonderful? now we can be civilized and properly dry clothes]

woo-hoo. let the flaunting begin.

- "The World Is Not Enough (U.N.K.L.E. Remix)", Garbage

i came around to tear your little world apart/and break your soul apart

i bought Garbage [their first album] when i was out helping Matt find a gift for someone. [intelligent guess says Jamie, whoever she is] The entire album is simply raw energy, blended with the strong, sharp beats of Garbage. Supervixen and Vow are so damn addictive, i've been listening to them back-to-back for days now. if you'd noticed the 'lyric' link below, i even wrote out the lyrics to Supervixen. for no reason at all.

Fun Fact: HMW stocks about any CD you could possibly want, but charges abysmal prices for them.

these few days, besides many other things, i've also experienced the true extent of how annoying 4J2003 can be, online and offline. i've more or less had it with most of the lot. and matt? sleep more. at night.

- "Vow", Garbage

make a whole new religion/i will be your religion/bow down to me

"It’s a strange thing about choices. People always like to think they’re making them, when in fact they are not. They like to think they’re deciding which movie to see, or which orange juice to buy, or where they’ll be taking their next vacation. And they are truly unaware that pages and pages of demographic studies, and tests, and focus groups have predetermined their “choices” long before they even get to the stage where they can decide. They are blissfully ignorant of being manipulated by a machine much, much larger than they.

Of course, I think that in some part of their subconscious mind, they have an awareness of the fact that they’re being “helpfully guided” through life by powers far superior to them. I think they need that guidance. I think they’d feel completely lost at sea without it.

Gaia needs my guidance right now. Just as she needs to feel that she has chosen to seek it out. She’ll make her choice as to whether or not she’s going to join me abroad, not understanding that the choice has already been made. All according to a plan.

Control. There are so many misconceptions about it. All this foolishness about how there’s no such thing. People love to convince themselves that they have some kind of free will and that this free will plays any roll in their choices. It’s really quite ridiculous. But I am eternally grateful for the illusion.

Because the illusion of free will is the one essential element in maintaining complete control."

- Loki

- "Supervixen", Garbage

can't you see the futility of it all?!

well. here we are. five days into 'spring break'. what has been accomplished so far?

>> item 2 on my holiday to-do. my Olympus is now in the hands of Olympus Singapore. the say it'll take about two weeks for quotation. their showroom looks like a Olympus exhibit, by the way. what seems like every modern Olympus every made is on display there. it was blissfully empty, though.
>> four EHist and four SStudies source-based questions.
>> two EMath worksheets.

so, contrary to my all-conquering theme today, i'm a bit of a lazy arse. business as usual then.

- "The World Is Not Enough", Garbage

missing: one Nike squirt water bottle

the times when i leave more than a week's gap in my blog are of five main types:

A: there's nothing happening worth writing home about
B: there's too much happening to write home about
C: i was just plain lazy
D: weekday computing is being frowned upon by my mother
E: all of the above

this week, it's E - A

plus, i lost my Nike water bottle, which cost me $13 and was bought together with the guys when we bought our class jerseys last year. i'm sure someone in 4H picked it up. whoever found it, please return. dump it unceremoniously at the desk i sit at during MT class, or whatever. just. return. it.

if there's nothing else, sod off. go find something else to do. i'm not in the best of moods now.

- "GHV2 Thunderpuss Megamix", Madonna

island life. love it.

Qn: why was the annual inter-school cross-country event moved to Sentosa [island life, love it!]?

An: so students and teachers alike can rediscover the charms of $3 iced teas, $12 fish-and-chips, getting sand everywhere, a monorail that's more believable as a a few six-seater rickshaws strung together and dragged along a rusting green track, mingling with Jappy and Cheena tourists in said rickshaw, the New Blazing-Hot-Fantasy-Carpark, etc.

in the usual disorganized-Victorians tradition, we were left to find our way to Wherever, and matt+pat showed off their anti-war banner everywhere they went. i was mortified. the P saw them and wanted to see the banner. somehow, they squirmed out of it.

i wasted three fucking hours of my life mucking around the monorail and the Southernmost Point Of Continental Asia. i did not purchase the abovementioned beverages and food products, making it a full 24 hours of non-nutrition that day. i tried to take some shots at Palawan Beach, to try and prove that i'm not completely useless behind a camera, but the damned Olympus failed me. i can't really expect it to work well with a damaged lens aperture, but i was pretty angry with the little runt anyway.

and all i had to do to gain free reign of Sentosa [island life, love it!] was to walk over to the VJC cohort [who, incidentally, were not forced to go] in plain sight of the instructors. i spent five minutes acting like i was one of them, talking to those i knew, and was outta there when some of them were moving.

i got back on the monorail again later, and was two stops past the arrival/departure center, when matt called and said he'd left. instantly i knew i was doomed to stuck in human traffic, and tried to make back to the center before the masses, but it looked like Sentosa [island life, love it!] was giving away Hello Kitties by the time the blue line bus pulled into the arrival/departure stop.

i had to float around the crowded mass-transit system for an hour to get to tuition. i bummed sandwiches and two coffees from my tuition teacher to keep me going [breaking my fast], but by the time tuition ended i was so tired i hailed a cab home.

funny how all cab drivers seem to know where Chuan Park is.

"This is the noise that keeps me awake
My head explodes and my body aches

Push it
Make the beats go harder
Push it
Make the beats go harder"

- "Push it", Garbage

it's. not. raining.

i wrote most of this entry on my Palm Vx, and it automatically caps the first letter after punctuation. so there.

For once, the weekend was better spent than a Monday in school.

I leave the house late, because of my fucking contact lenses, and have to threaten my punctuality, taking the risk of taking TIBS 106, which i have never done before. I'd compliment TIBS on their excellent bus services, but i'm too pissed off now.

I get to school, and they have a sex talk. They clearly overestimate the maturity of the students in this school. HIV/AIDS is not a topic for Monday morning discussion. I will not repeat the questions posed after the talk, but they covered excessive masturbation, the age of consent & the problems commonly associated with a torn condom.

I hope the school has learnt something from this.

After assembly, i grabbed my bag from the classroom as stalked off to my free period, cutting through the bullshit served up on a platter by my classmates. As usual.

So why am i surprised when none other than Mr Alvin Pfeiffer Lim comes over and decides to be the first to disturb me this week? He trots over to the bench i'm sitting at, and wants to see the i was reading. It was already more than an arm's length away from him, but i sensed that he wouldn't buzz off without it. Hence, i handed the book over & moved on to finding something else to do. He buzzed off, uttering something about returning it the next time saw me. Exit Mr Lim.

Enter Mdm Kwok, informing me that my classmates managed a 100% distinction in geography. I knew that, along with their results, about three hours before they they knew last Friday. And even if i didn't, i certainly didn't need another My-Time-Had-Passed reminder. but, no. she even goes on to talk about how great it would have been if i had continued along with then last year. how insenstitive is that?

then Pfeiffer joins her and cackles about seeing my name there next year. i shouted that it was already - under Withdrawn

why can't they just leave me alone?

"I'm only happy when it rains
I feel good when things are going wrong
I only listen to the sad, sad songs
I'm only happy when it rains

I only smile in the dark
My only comfort is the night gone black
I didn't accidentally tell you that
I'm only happy when it rains

You'll get the message by the time I'm through
When I complain about me and you
I'm only happy when it rains"

- "Only Happy When It Rains", Garbage

wistful

spent another useless Friday of school waiting for the 12:30 bell to ring. [i've only 35 mins of geography on friday. PE & Cheena aren't exactly critical subjects] difference was, today was also the release of 2002 'O' Level results.

there are details i won't mention here, for fear of persecution from the Ministry Of Education. therefore, this account begins at 1230.

1230 after relentless hounding from my ex-classmates, i tell them that i was in class, and now have to run over to my aunt's place to check her computer. she claimed it was an emergency, that she needed to print something important. there was no way i could leave her to flounder on her own [1) she's in a wheelchair 2) her computer is often her only means of income as a real estate agent 3) i once spent 20 mins rigged up to my Ericsson through a headset, trying to get her to tell me the HP printer for which se installed a driver. i felt, and probably looked, like Sandra Bullock hooked up to her Motorola at her desk in Two Weeks' Notice]

1430 two grueling hours later, i managed to leave my aunt, peace restored. unfortunately, the results were already being given out.

1604 arrived at school. hall emptied.

i ended up meeting, by chance, Ian, David, Munbbill and Daniel, absolutely by chance, as they were chatting with Mrs Raj. helped her out a little, and got a lift home in her new Nissan Sunny Luxury Edition. not exactly an inspired choice, but then again not exactly a Proton Wira, either. apparently the poor Wira was in a two-car-collision last Friday The Thirteenth. she said she would have bought a Nissan 350Z if she hadn't sent her son off to Melborne, Dell Insprion laptop and all. Mrs Raj driving a 3.5 liter sports coupé? cool.

but, before you think i had some miraculous breakthrough, i was more depressed than ever inside. actually, wistful's the word i'd use.

"for what it's worth - I love you!
and what is worse - I really do
for what it's worth - I'm gonna run run run
'til the sweetness gets to you
and what is worse - I love you!"

- "For What It's Worth", The Cardigans

haha x 7 - ha

Prefects' Investiture
estimated attendance: 1024
number who really wanted to be there: 14
remarks: this is a waste of time

Head Prefect's Speech
estimated attentive: 24
number of times audience was looked at in speech: 0
remarks: who are you addressing?!

GoH Speech
estimated attentive: 33
estimated wowed by wit: 0
remarks: you're not witty, you know. stop trying.

Prefects' Pledge
estimated silent: 1016
estimated jokers: 8
remarks: ain't this pledge for prefects-to-be-inducted only?

Prefects' Dance
recognized song: 1024
thought it was a good choice: 5
remarks: how many different songs can the same choreography be used in?

Prefects' Song
seconds the swaying started early by: 15
seconds after which no-one was listening: 5
remarks: who wrote that thing?!

Band Performance
songs played: 1
songs enjoyed: 1
remarks: oh, so this is why we're here.

and as you can guess, it was a complete load of crap. except for the band bit. fabulous as ever. oh, and this is eVSPB. what is with the waves and color scheme? since when have they branched out into catering and party entertainment, in addition to their indispensable ushering service?

got a taste of what the O level results would feel like for me when the ex-prefects came back for the investiture. nervous laughter and awkward conversation all round. then they all left for a function at VJC. maybe i should just disappear tomorrow. who wants to hang around The Retainee anyway?

"And I'm losing my favorite game
You're losing your mind again
I'm losing my baby,
Losing my favorite game

- "My Favorite Game", The Cardigans

Been It.

it's monday again. we were unceremoniously dumped at my aunt's place, where the Lim family was playing Mahjong. my mom decided to head over to her friend's place to play mahjong, taking one of my sisters home first.

this resulted in our reaching home, with the 'portable' [i had to collapse it and lug it to the car] mahjong table and half-finished pot of spaghetti, at midnight, in the back of a silver Toyota RAV4 L.

needless to say, i was pissed. and that screwed the monday that followed. sleeping only five hours, i headed off to school in a newly-bought, starched-up, damned-uncomfortable shirt. why did i buy a new shirt? so i would be less uncomfortable on mondays, with a tie.

oh, and i got like, 25/25 on my maths CA1. suppressing vague memories of being awarded first in level in primary one, i chose to raise my eyebrows. my mom barely lifted one when i told her.

"Poor donee,
What are you gonna try to be?
Where are you gonna go without me, now?

I've been your mother,
I've been your father
You couldn't ask me for more

I've been your sister,
I've been your mistress
Maybe I was your whore

You couldn't ask me for more"

- "Been It", The Cardigans

Do you care whether your phone looks trendy?

0.714285714286 marks per minute. or 1.4 minutes per mark. those, according the icon marked Calc on my Palm Vx, is the mark/time ratio for my 25-mark, 35-minute core geography paper today.

i finished enough to, if i got all that i wrote down right, just pass with 13 marks. two and a half parts out of seven. it's not bloody enough. ELECTIVE geography students get 45 minutes to work on their paper.

i was enraged. when mdm kwok [the geog teacher] came into class and made a fuss about not being able to enter through the front door, it was pushing the limit. but when Doraemon was called in to 'ambush' the late comers [from PE] and those in PE uniform, i blew my fuse. my pencil, which was already broken into two, was now in at least six pieces.

it took all of my trouble-avoidance-system to stop myself from pointing out, bluntly or otherwise, that more time would be saved letting them stay in their PE uniform [especially those who had AOP later] than to come in, swagger around, congratulate those who were in normal uniform already, and ensure that the rest all change before 10:15 am. the geography class starts at 10:10 am. PE ends at 10:00 am. we can start on time, without sacrificing the 5 minutes if those who do not want to or need more time to change can stay in their PE uniform until recess. however, this simple theory does not seem to fit in with the 24th Century robotic cat's logic.

then there was the door. what's so disdainful about entering through the back door? it's in no way a longer or shorter route to the staff room. does she want a red carpet next time? perhaps madamé would like a cooling iced tea while she waits for the monitor, sent up four floors, to get the key? or how about a warm hot chocolate while she's inside?

i will not mention the outcome of my Cheena paper, as i deliberately did not study for it. i will not submit myself to the ancient-Confucian-rote-'learning'-system for a CA, especially if i'm gonna risk failing other subjects for 'vocabulary' i won't remember five minutes after the test. i'll save it for the Prelims and the Os.

however, all this only served to depress me a lot after i got over the initial rage. plus, i saw alvin lim get picked up by his wife after school. thought about how lucky he is to have someone care enough to drive all the way out to pick him up.

this + academic pointlessness + dismal Cheena score + definite failure in geography = listening to Across The Universe, Drops of Jupiter & Demons on loop, and tearing up on the bus. what a loser. i mean, on an SBS bus of all things. it'll be the bus-stop next.

oh, one last thing. did the Matchmaker thing on the Nokia website, to see which one of their exquisite models they'd recommend the likes of me. here's the third question:

Do you care whether your phone looks trendy?

one of the answers to choose from was "Yes, of course!" [sheep! ba-aaa!!!]

ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha !!!

- "Demons (featuring Macy Gray)", Fatboy Slim

Drops Of Jupiter

"Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken,
Your best friend always sticking up for you,
Even when I know you're wrong?

Can you imagine no first dance, freeze-dried romance,
Five-hour phone conversation,
The best soy latte that you ever had, and me?"

-"Drops Of Jupiter", Train

somehow, i don't think i ever need to imagine.

The Point

i think you're in serious trouble if you wake up thinking about the point of your own existence. the problem being that my mind decided that there was no point.

usually, i wake up, register that the alarm is waking and that my eyes are open, before i start philosophizing. but for the last two mornings, i don't even get past the alarm. before i hear or see anything, i register the apparent pointlessness of my mortality.

great start to the day, huh? better than a rousing breakfast of some Listerine [to rinse my mouth with, not to swallow] and Malaccan coffee. the rest of the day can't get any better, of course: yesterday i tried to kill 2 hours slumming at Toa Payoh HDB Hub after school with Pat [who wanted to buy a Body Shop gift pack for V-Day] and Ivan [who wanted to trade in his Nokia 8250 for a Nokia 8310. feeling pointless, i decided not to try and persuade him otherwise], then had a mock-disaster as me, my two sisters and my mom made our way to Bouna Vista to replace the two aforementioned madamés' misplaced School Smart Cards.

we arrived at 5:10 pm. TransitLink's 7-11-sized "Customer Service Centre" closed at 5 and was no longer accepting queue-ers. we trudged back to the car.

i will not even mention the fiasco in school. that Teckhua™ is retarded, completely without shame & just plain illogical is common knowledge. alarming how i know this after just one month in the class.

today, it was painfully obvious that i was older than everyone else. other times that this surfaced was on LNY eve [when all and alumni came back to visit and gush JC], and when the 2002 yearbook was given out [it was basically a A4-sized maroon beacon alerting me to the fact that My Time Had Passed]

however, today it was the level of maturity that i experienced that made me wince. this can be attributed to the problem of being in the close proximity of Teckhua™  [he was bare-socked today because his colored shoes were confiscated by the DM, and he spent his time either sleeping in class, or justifying his unconsciousness], but watching Pleasantville with the color-blind was simply [insert adjectival expletive here]. oh, the irony.

Matt stated that no-one in the class except him knew the song that was featured at the end of Pleasantville. Across The Universe. Fiona Apple. and, yes, i know that it was originally written by The Beatles.

hmm. that came out harsher than intended. what the hell.

i spent 5 hours today waiting at the TransitLink "Customer Service Center" again. basically not following instructions, my two wonderful sisters made us mooch around there twice as long as we had to. i couldn't even get my rebates cause the machine was broken, which begged the question of why the hell i was there.

- "Cherry Lips (Go Baby Go!)", Garbage

The New Mercedes-Benz S600L with PRE-SAFE

ah. coffee. felt much better today, and actually managed to crack up some. if this were a Monday, i'd be disgusted with myself. laughter is alright on a Wednesday, i guess.

Pat & Matt discovered the joys of my Palm Vx today. spent part of my free period sending a Porsche operator logo to Matt's 8210 [it went off, and i had no idea which profile was silent. Note To All Nokia Users: Stop Renaming Your Profile Names. at least the message alert wasn't the annoying beep-beep-beep-BEEP-BEEP-beep-beep-beep "SMS" tone], which he promptly wanted to change at recess. why can't Nokians make up their minds? first Xpress-On covers, now operator logos. strangely enough, though, i'm not annoyed.

took 105 with my sis home from tuition. single-decker, as usual, due the laws of physics dictating that a double-decker model cannot fit under the CTE's Braddell flyover. the bus was so fucking crowded. why can't they just demolish the fucking flyover so we can commute in comfort?

they played this Merc ad on TVmobile, depicting an S-Class being driven rather spiritedly, and how the PRE-SAFE features would be prepared to prevent the S-Class's occupants from injury.

Right.

99% of Merc drivers in singapore wouldn't know good steering if it bit them in the testicles. try something to prevent carpal tunnel syndrome, after long hours with one thumb on the wheel and four fingers on the dashboard. and let's not forget the other arm hanging out the window, possibly holding a cigarette. they need an ashtray near the wing-mirror. in fact, replace the wing mirror with an ashtray. who looks in it anyway?

also, the bus driver must have thought he was driving The New Mercedes-Benz S600L, because he treated the brake pedal as an on-off switch. everyone else was slipping and sliding about the place, with the seated elderly staring at us as if we were purposely sliding about.

saw yet another motorcycle accident on the road. motorcyclists are really the scourge of the universe, second to Merc drivers who think that their three-pointed-star gives them automatic right-of-way. you'd have to be pretty delusional to want to wrap yourself round a two-wheeled vehicle that requires speed for stability.

- "Breaking Up The Girl", Garbage

the aftermath

spent yesterday sleeping till two and basically wallowing. didn't drink coffee today. went to school and pissed e-v-e-r-y-o-n-e off. came home and there was a fucking buffet on the dining table. my mom was throwing a mahjong party. normal people throw dinner parties. my mom is, therefore, not normal. no-one worth talking to came online. managed to finish the vicvox2003 page.

- "#1 Crush", Garbage

Cheena Day, Part 2

"simply tormenting"

"you couldn't have paid me to do it again"

"is suicide legal?"

my idiot brother broke my Olympus C-2020 Zoom digital camera today. he simply grabbed hold of the lens aperture and pulled the whole thing off. a bit like castration.

it was, and still is, the only thing my useless father has bought for me in 12 years.

Olympus Singapore says that it is a Japanese model [yea, i really needed you to tell me that. i HAVE actually turned the damn thing on before, YOU KNOW?] and therefore it does not provide support for it, even though it is, hardware-wise, identical to the C-2040 Zoom.

the entire world can go and fuck off right now.

- "13 X Forever", Garbage

Mercedes-Benz 520i & Cheena Day, Part 1

so here we go. day two/one [depending on whether you count the eve] of Cheena New Year. we woke up round 10 - 11am, ushering in the new year by being lazy slobs.

trooping over to my granddad's house, we spent roughly an hour being patronized by relatives i wouldn't accept angbaos from or willingly spend that much of my time with, if it wasn't absolutely necessary. i managed to spend some good time unwasted, in talking to my two aunts and my granddad, though. especially with my first aunt, who i thought was going to freak out about me retaining, being the academic sort that she is. [not that that isn't a good thing] but she was very encouraging, which is more than i can say for my mother, who has said nothing positive since the day my retention was decided.

at my granddad-in-law's place, things were much warmer. the adults launched into mahjong, and us kids were left to our own vices, namely the PlayStation and blackjack with my aunt's boyfriend.

my mom left at 6 for another mahjong session. later i would find out that she would not make it home until 9 am the next morning. my second aunt's boyfriend, Samuel, offered to take us out to see a movie later on, but all the tickets for Shanghai Knights were either booked or sold, and i wouldn't watch Hero [a) it's frankly too Cheena for me b) Matt gave it a really lousy review. ok, so he was talking about the subtitles, but it sounded laughable], so we didn't even check listings for that. we ended up blackjacking and PlayStationing until 10 or so.

i made over a thousand Monopolian dollars [we played with Monopoly money, each starting with $500] at blackjack, and won six out of seven races at the PlayStation [Gran Turismo, Gran Turismo 2, Le Mans 24]. i discovered that not only is Garbage featured on the GT2 soundtrack [I Think I'm Paranoid, but i knew this about a year ago], but As Heaven Is Wide is also featured in GT1.

my third aunt sent us home in her Honda Stream. we got home around 11, and i was up till 2 remodeling this site and IMing Matt.

something i noticed today. the BMW 520i is becoming increasingly popular. it's all Performance Motor's fault. they have this overtrade scheme to entice those looking for a cheap means of showing off the wealth they either don't have or desperately need to display. they need to clear stock to accommodate the first new 5-series in what must be 10 years. i mean, more power to BMW [as opposed to an exceedingly opulent [vulgar] Mercedes-Benz E200], but now it's just as common as the Toyota Corolla, Nissan Sunny and, of course, the evergreen towkay's choice, the Merc E-Class. Sheep. Baa-aaa-aaa. Strike one car off the 'my-first-car-list' [second-hand or otherwise]

- "As Heaven Is Wide", Garbage

the worst cheena new year's eve ever

i hate the lunar new year.

firstly, it never fails that i fall ill during the season. i'm weak and feverish now. i think i'm allergic to all things cheena,

secondly, i had to go to school today for three free periods, no lessons and one lame concert. the concert band, arguably the best of the three victoria school cultural groups, emulated the cheena orchestra today. ewww. in a sense it was a successful emulation, as they managed to make a normally beautiful-sounding clarinet sound like a Cheena Funeral Trumpet, but a successful concert cheena music does not make.

thirdly [and this deserves a separate paragraph due to its severity], i am seriously considering severing all ties with my school's av department. today's backstage work was horrendous. from seniors that don't know if they're on duty & couldn't be bothered to leave class early to set up, to microphones on stands placed too close to [and eventually ended up being dragged by] the curtain, and constant feedback [that weeaaooowww sound], coupled with poor timing and momentous unresponsivity.

fourthly, my granddad has just been discharged from Tan Tock Seng, where he was admitted into for heart failure. kinda puts a damper on festivities.

fifthly, my father has been detained in Papua New Guinea for attempting to export baby sea cumbers. [apparently an endangered species, although i can't fathom why] so it seems bribery didn't get him far enough. this will be the second year in a row that he didn't turn up for the lunar new year. but it doesn't really matter. to quote 'About A Boy', he'd "have been a useless father, wherever [he was] was living, so i don't see what difference it makes"

sixthly, ex-boys came back. those of you who do not know [or feel the compulsive urge to act shocked], i have been retained one year. that means that i am in my fifth year at victoria school, and all those my age, those i have befriended over the past two years, have moved on to tertiary education. now, you try sitting there, listening to a couple of people you used to be able to look in the eye and talk to talk about their JC life, how yadda-yadda-yadda. i got the hell out of there once Simon was done with my Palm. ended up talking 853, falling asleep while listening to the sad-song part of my CD-RW on repeat and feeling extremely sorry for myself. i woke up in Yishun, and had to spent another hour getting home. in the end, i wasted two good hours sleeping and being upset.

i think i'll top myself if i have to go through this shit again next year.

"Demons (featuring Macy Gray)", Fatboy Slim

malaccan coffee & why people drive 300km to buy it

if i laid out today in narrative form, it would take forever, and run on for pages. hence, today's efficient bullet-point system.

0600 woke up tired, angry and with a headache. asked the maid to make a cup of coffee, which i try not to drink first thing in the morning, as it has an even less effect on me then. i'm one of those that don't get affected by a TCBATL [read: Coffee Bean] Double-Shot Ultimate Ice Blended [and that's with chocolate-covered expresso beans]

0625 supposed to leave the house to catch my regular bus [the 0630 105], but was busy looking for my chinese text

0630 gave up on catching 105, drank the coffee and left [with CL Text] to catch the 0640 159

0658 reached Toa Payoh Bus Interchange, in time to see the  0655 26 leave

0703 boarded the 0700 26

0711 arrived at the bus stop, and strided to school. didn't notice i was striding, though, as i normally walk pretty fast anyway

0715 entered the classroom. surprisingly, both doors were unlocked. started to notice that everyone was more irritating than usual, and that impatience was being added to my frame of mind. Matt, as usual, was seated, sorry, sleeping behind me. someone mentioned someone else getting a new Sony Ericsson. i automatically assumed it was the same model as my Ericsson T68m [meaning a Sony Ericsson T68i], was at the same time angry with whoever bought it [still don't know the model or the owner] and was completely fed up with that fact. stormed out of the classroom for what appeared to the rest of the world to be no good reason

ahh, i give up. basically, i had coffee too strong for my own good, and shit happened. never again.

- "Shut Your Mouth", Garbage

[one and three-fifths months later]

"Welcome
We love you
We hate you
We love you
We want you
We need you
We wish we were like you
They say you're a saint
You're a whore
You're a sinner
That he had you
He made you
He can't live without you
Would you confess if we asked
That you nurture the urge
To declare that it’s time
To settle down
With a man of your own
You want a baby
A family
A piece of security

Shut your mouth
Try not to panic
Just shut your mouth
If you can do it
Shut your mouth
Try not to panic
Just shut your mouth
If you can do it
Just shut your mouth

What's your opinion of the dire situation
In our land here
Our guest here
Of course you'll be nice here
How do you feel about God and religion
Are you good people
Bad people
Guess it doesn't matter people
Your place
My place
Make her bring that famous face
You got some
You want some
You wanna let me get you some
We know your music but of course we'd never buy it
It’s too fake man
Right man!
[We don't give a fucking damn]

Shut your mouth
Try not to panic
Just shut your mouth
If you can do it
Shut your mouth
Try not to panic
Just shut your mouth
If you can do it

I hear you say it
Play it smart girl
Win the game love
Give’em what they want
What they want to see and you could be a big star
You could go far
Make a landmark
What have you been reading you smart girl?
Win the game love
Give’em what they want
What they want to see and you could be a big star
You could go far
Make a landmark
Make a shitload

And the world spins by
With everybody moaning
Pissing, bitching and everyone is shitting
On their friends
On their love
On their oaths
On their honor
On their graves
On their mouths
And their words say nothing

Shut your mouth
Try not to panic
Just shut your mouth
If you can do it
Shut your mouth
Try not to panic
Just shut your mouth
If you can do it
Just shut your mouth

I waited to say something
Oh shut your mouth
I wanted to say something
Just shut your mouth
I waited to say something
Oh shut your mouth
I wanted to be something
Just shut your mouth"

- "Shut Your Mouth", Garbage